I think my 7 y.o. SD is lying about my bio son
I need help with this...
I just received a call from our neighbor who says she overheard my SD (7 y.o.) telling her daughter that one of my bio sons (13 & 14) had removed her panties and put them on her dresser.
I am mortified and humiliated. I don't think either of my sons would ever do anything like that.
This is not the only problem we have had with the SD. She refuses to eat anything cooked at our house unless it is chicken nuggets or corndogs. Also last summer, we caught her and a friend trying to throw our 6 mo. old chihuahua over the trampoline net, which would have surely killed her. Their attempt failed but they did succeed in breaking her tail in 2 places.
She is coming tonight so we can talk to her about the claim she is making and I don't know what to do. I am worried this is going to break up my new marriage of just over a year.
wow that is a hard one to
wow that is a hard one to deal with there. if I was you I would have a talk with my sons to find out what is going on, and also I would not allow her to be alone with my children. My ss9 lies so much I actually have put the baby monitor in the room when him and my son are together on weekends. Is there an outside adult that can talk to your two boys and see what is going on?
I don't have anyone that can
I don't have anyone that can talk to my boys. Unfortunately, I am currently taking my ex back to court. I guess I will just have to talk to the boys myself. Yikes.
Thank you for your reply. I
Thank you for your reply. I am sorry to hear your husband isn't willing to stand with you. I am very lucky in that respect.
I have never heard of
I have never heard of Bratterina??? Actually my DH gets defensive sometimes, even when he knows he is wrong. He tries hard to convince himself that she is an angel. Which, on the outside she appears to be. Strange huh?
I want to thank everyone who
I want to thank everyone who replied to me today...you all helped tremendously.
I spoke to my boys and they adamently denied doing anything inappropriate to her.
The neighbor has agreed to visit with SD tonight to see if she can get anymore of the story. Then my husband and I will be talking to her and the his ex.
Oh boy...fun tonight!
Update...last night SD told
Update...last night SD told BM and BM called asking us to meet and talk. She was mad and so was I but we communicated great, while my husband just sat there...geez. Get this, before we went we had gotten into a huge fight because from the day before he had completely turned 180. He was completely on SD side.
BM and I talked a lot and decided that my son did not take off her underwear. BM said SD is extremely boy crazy...a 7 y.o.??? BM said SD told her that last week a boy from school had inappropriately touched her butt. SD needs counseling!
This morning BM called me and told me that SD has gotten up in the middle of the night before and removed her underwear after toileting and didn't remember the next day.
I am still mortified that my bio son is having to deal with this accusation.
Anyway...GEEZ! :O
I don't know what to do about
I don't know what to do about SD. I am still in shock i guess. BM and DH are going to get SD in counseling. They agreed to that last night...I had to suggest it. We just heard about the claim at school last night...I don't think BM told school nor us. She just talked to SD about it. We are planning a family meeting tonight with all kids to talk. I have the feeling my boys are going to request her weekends with us be switched so she isn't there when they are, which is fine with me. I think that is the best solution to protect my boys.
SD is sticking to her story and DH is now taking her side, even with all the other information.
I am hoping tonight's meeting will either shed some light or we will make changes to protect my boys.
If she's boy crazy now, OMG -
If she's boy crazy now, OMG - she's going to be psycho by the time she reaches puberty. I will pray for you because it's not looking good. And the older she gets, it seems like the worst she gets.
i didnt' read any replies,
i didnt' read any replies, but i'd sure be telling bm that I will start video taping her playing around my house and if she abuses anyone or any pet in your home again bm will be FULLY responsible and sued if claim is fought
Throwing the family chihuahua
Throwing the family chihuahua happened last summer, but what irritates me is that we talked to BM about it and her response was way too mild. She had the gaul to say, "Don't throw our dog". Although I like BM, her and DH are in denial about SD.
Even if our puppy had died, I
Even if our puppy had died, I think SD needs counseling. Something is wrong with this child and now I am scared for mine.
I would never think of sueing BM. Actually she has been more rational and helpful than my husband. But they are both in denial...she is their little angel.
if she is daughter's primary
if she is daughter's primary care taker and "neglecting" her mental well being-yeah it's a possiblity
tequina, have you ever
tequina, have you ever considered that your SD7 could be telling the truth, and that your son is sexually abusing her? She's SEVEN years old, what does she know about lying about boys pulling off panties and putting it on the dresser. it sounds more like a specific recollection of what's happening. 7-year olds don't lie to each other with THOSE kinds of stories. That's very bizzare.
Its sad this poor girl has a selfish stepmom who is blindly ignoring the fact that she might very well be abused by your sons. Instead of investigating the matter, you immediately dismiss her claim as a lie! Wow, poor kid stands no chance in that house.
She's SEVEN years old, you're bringing in sexual abuse and fussy eating into the same thread. That poor child.
Your upset and replying to my
Your upset and replying to my forum because I think you are a selfish SM because your upset with your husband for staying in the hospital with his son.
HMMMMM
However, if BM called & said
However, if BM called & said that SD did remove her own underwear at BM's without recollection & bio son wasn't there, it does indicate that she could've removed her own underwear at bio-dad's house & when she woke up without them & they were on her dresser assumed it was bio son because she didn't remember doing it herself.
It should be discussed with a counselor.
I think you're being a bit extreme in stating that "poor kid stands no chance in that house" at this point, & I think it's unfair for you to state that tequina is a "selfish stepmom who is blindly ignoring the fact that she might very well be abused by your sons". In fact, as she has stated, tequina has NOT ignored the possibility. She has been investigating & talking with several different people about it, & has gone as far as having the neighbor talk with SD to see if she can get more clarification. She IS investigating.
BTW...SD doesn't recall
BTW...SD doesn't recall having her panties removed. She says she thought they were on when she went to bed and woke up and they were off. That is hardly a specific recollection.
Her BM even says she has been know to remove her undies while sleep walking after using the restroom.
foxxystep...you are way way out of line...go back to bed and rest. Your unborn child needs you to be a rational and good parent.
I've often heard that
I've often heard that children can be too afraid to point the finger at their actual abuser so they point it elsewhere just to get it out and let someone know they're being hurt.Have you considered maybe she really is being abused by someone she doesn't want to "tattle on"?
I have thought about that and
I have thought about that and BM and I talked about it also. BM is seeking a counselor as we speak. I think that will be our best support. I hope so anyway.
Thank you so much for
Thank you so much for responding and sharing your story with me. This has been pretty tough on all of us. My son has handled it amazingly.