I am at the end of my rope and ready to SCREAM!!!! My SS who is 17 was arrested for underaged drinking TWICE within a week last December. He is now on probation and by court order has to see a drug and alcohol counselor until she is convinced that he doesn't have a problem. (This, by the way, costs me and my husband $150 for EACH visit.) My husband thinks that these sessions are really having an impact on the boy, however I was informed by a close friend of the family that SS has pictures posted on a social networking site of him drinking and smoking with captions underneath boasting about how "high" he was....date stamped ONE WEEK AGO!!! I look it up and show his father who then confronts him about it and he tells his dad that we are so F-ing stupid and need to mind our own F-ing business. My husband gets angry but does nothing about it...says he can't help it because the kid won't listen. I am FURIOUS!!!! Friday SS's probation officer calls my husband to ask how things are going...and HE LIED and told the PO that everything was going great that SS was getting good grades, going to school everyday, working two jobs, and staying out of trouble! Every single part of that is a lie!!!! We just got mid-terms his highest grades are D's, he gets to go back to school tomorrow after being suspended for 5 days for two unexcused absences, he is dangerously close to being fired from the only job that he has because he is constantly calling off, and obviously he is still drinking! I called the PO today to tell him the truth, because I am tired of SS setting a bad example for his brother and my BS and getting away with it. The probation officer calls him for a meeting, drug tests him (it was dirty...PO tells him to clean up and he will test him again in 3 weeks so that they have a clean one to submit to the judge), confronts him about the pictures, grades, etc..., and then proceeds to ask SS why he thinks that his step mother would want him to get into trouble. Of course that leads to SS coming over and telling his father that I went to PO today. My husband EXPLODES and also allows his son to yell and swear at me. (My own doing, I guess, but I honestly believed that I was doing something for the greater good.) PO also called my husband wanting to know why I was causing problems!!! Sooooo not only has the little bastard gotten away with breaking the law AGAIN, but he has also gained an upperhand. Tomorrow I am supposed to have a meeting with the city attorney with regards to SS's behavior and lack of compliance. I am not sure if I should go through with it! My question is....have I overstepped my boundaries or am I warranted in doing what I'm doing so that the other boys do not get the wrong ideas about breaking the rules???? ANY and ALL advice will be helpful! Thank you!!!!