BM Over For Thanksgiving...Pass the Cranberry Sauce
After surviving the birth of SD's baby...she has the gigantic sized balls of an elephant to come up with something new to yet further feel she has some control.
She's now home with the baby and left to care for her son. She's no longer at the hospital having everyone coo and caw over her princess ass. So I'm sure she had to come up with some kind of drama.
Ready?
She calls DH and says she's thinking about Thanksgiving...it's always been her father's holiday and all his kids, their partners, and kids come to his house. She had already told him that she intended on bringing the baby to our house, along with some members of her husband's to be family...
Now her mind is turning about her mother..how will mommy see the baby on Thanksgiving? It would kill 2 birds with one stone if she just came along to the family celebration!
SD lives about an hour and 10 minutes from us and about an hour from her mother...travel time is what she's thinking about. How will she see both her divorced parents on that particular day? It's the baby's first Thanksgiving after all...
Well, for one thing..she's had Thanksgiving with her daddy for the past 6 years without her mother. And everything was just fine. It won't be any different this year either.
No BM in my house for ANY holiday. Period.
I told DH if that ever happens, he and I will have to sit down and seriously discuss our marriage because somewhere there is a breakdown of exactly what a divorce truly means. I would never invite my ex husband to my home..and our daughter lives with me!
Just because a grown woman wants something...it does NOT have to be done. The look on DH's face when he told me of her latest scheme was priceless...I just looked at him and told him "You created her" and reminded him that if she had not been allowed to be so controlling over the years than this bullshit would not be happening now.
I've already sat thru time in a hospital room with the BM..I'm about to embark on the wedding...I will NOT share a holiday with that woman. And just because SD feels it should happen. She's full of shit.
DH was pretty quiet the rest of the afternoon. I think out of embarrassment. I'd be embarrassed too if my daughter was such an idiot.
Thoughts?
No way would my husband allow
No way would my husband allow his ex-wife in our home. Just wouldn't happen.
Oh DH isn't allowing
Oh DH isn't allowing it..lol..trust me.
He's just flabbergasted that his daughter just keeps up with this insanity. There's a part of him that wants so hard to believe that she isn't just like her mother, but when she does shit like this it's a sharp reminder just HOW MUCH she really is like her.
But - his own fault. And it's a hard pill to swallow I'm sure. :sick:
I guess all you can do is
I guess all you can do is keep hoping that she eventually grows out of it. Do you think she is still taking cues from her mom? Maybe her mother suggested it???
Hi Mom! Yes, if I had to
Hi Mom!
Yes, if I had to wonder I would say her mother probably had some hand in it. If not, she's cried and moaned about the new baby and how she won't see him..played on SD's heartstrings enough that SD just took off and ran with it. And SD is such a lunatic she just called Daddy and set the ball rolling.
Amazing, eh?
Hello! Well Skidsmimi...when
Hello!
Well Skidsmimi...when DH has told SD no in the past, it's become an all out warfest.
This is NOT the first time she's tried to push Ms.Elvira on Crack a/k/a Benjamin Buttons in our home. Oh no...it's been done 2 times before. And both times were scream fests where my DH just about lost his voice telling her NO.
First time was when her mother was working as a salesperson..she wanted to park in our driveway and walk our neighborhood. We live in a very nice neighborhood and DH was not having anyone know he knew her or was ever associated with her. He told SD that and she went off the deep end..told him she hated him and how dare he talk about her mother like that! Poor little baby was just so upset! DH stood his ground on that and needless to say....our driveway was clear of her car! }:)
Second time was when she thought her mother was going to 'spend the day' at our home watching SD's pup who was coming down to visit with SD...DH blew up on that one and told her she had better NEVER tell him what to do in his own home...Screamfest 2 was on for quite some time on that one. Again, SD did not win out.
Just like on this one..she won't win out. DH may have told her NO now..but mark my words. This won't be the last of it. SD will stew over it and it will come out again. And it will be one for the books I'm sure.
I just may have to record this one so I'll have something to watch later in the year on those cold winter nights.
Exactly Maux! THEY created
Exactly Maux!
THEY created it! THEY allowed their 'kids' to turn into 'adults' and act like spoiled, entitled brats gone wild.
My daughter is 20 and if she EVER acted in this way..and I told DH this just the other day...she and I would be in a boxing ring. No child of mine will ever act that spoiled and entitled and make me feel that the person I'm with is EXPECTED to put up with it just because I may.
There is no way in hell that if my DH puts up with his daughter's selfish, spoiled, manipulative behavior he's going to tell me that I have to. I've had to remind him she's not my daughter..and she made that clear when she said I came along and took her father from her. According to her, I'm a stranger so I don't know many strangers that would put up with her bullshit..hell, I don't know many family members that would put up with her bullshit.
In fact, her aunt...my SIL...calls her "The Bug" - she's had to deal with her shit since pre-teen life with my SD and she's a pro at it. She calls her out continuously and isn't afraid to tell her she's a liar.
I love my SIL. }:)
I'm sorry you have to deal
I'm sorry you have to deal with this AGAIN!! Maybe invite all her ex boyfriends to the house for thanksgiving and see if she likes that. I'm sure there's at least one or two bad breakups that she doesn't want to deal with.. }:) The look on her face would be priceless..
I had to giggle at your
I had to giggle at your title, but perhaps it should be "pass the turkey" or the "hot potato." LOL. Why can't BM and SD meet up somewhere after for coffee if BM needs to see him on that day? As if a baby cares about Thanksgiving! But no! She wants to set up another lovefest like in her hospital room, SD sitting in a cozy chair while all the relatives swirl around her.
Better set parameters now because we will soon have Baby's First Christmas! Baby's First Easter! Baby's First Valentine's Day! Baby's First Groundhog Day! Etc.! And the real big one: Baby's First Birthday!! I'll tell you my horror story on that one later.
Trust me don't do it. I have
Trust me don't do it. I have done the be the bigger person deal before and it just turns around and bites you in the butt. For some reason if your nice once, it opens the BMs so called mind up that it's okay for her to be involved to whatever extent she wants. Been there, done that and I burned the t-shirt! My door will never be open to the BM. If the skids want to spend time with her they will have to do it somewhere other than our house. It's hard enough spending the time at other family functions where she is much less bringing it into our home.
Maybe it's time that SD
Maybe it's time that SD starts her own traditions if she doesn't like the current one. I'd tell her it would be a shame not to see her and the baby, but perhaps she should have Thanksgiving at her own house with her soon-to-be family and BM.
Excellent proposition
Excellent proposition Persephone. She's a woman now - she needs to establish her own traditions. And what's interesting is nothing was mentioned about her soon-to-be in-laws, only that "some" of them would be coming. That imposition is enough, let alone wanting to include BM. Girlfriend needs to get a grip.