In my experience, not necessarily. In my state, they calculate CS based on both parents' income. If there isn't any income, like in her case, they compute it based on what they call "earning capacity", which is basically whatever she was making before she lost her job. If your BF's income hasn't changed since last CS review, I don't see why they would raise CS - unless the judge is one of those BM-lovers. It's unfortunate she lost a job, but she needs to find a new one if she wants to keep the same standard of living, not supplement from CS. But that's logic and logic doesn't reside much in CS laws. Good luck!

he's not giving the "loser mother" any money.....he's giving her child SUPPORT....you know.....to support his child?!?!

Ya but the thing is that it's none of your business. Once the support is in her pocket, it's her money, not yours.....now if there was neglect going on, then your BF should go to court....other than that, she can spend the whole 400$ on twinkies.........doesn't matter. But the faster people get over this and understand this, the easier it will be for everyone

If she is unemployed and unable to financially take care of the child maybe who has custody of the child needs to be considered. Just a thought.

If she is unemployed and unable to financially take care of the child maybe who has custody of the child needs to be considered. Just a thought.

Regardless of the house the 2 of you have together, the law says his financial obligation is first to his child(ren). That's just how it is. There is no law stating that the parent receiving support has to provide detail for how the money is spent. The fact that you can't stand her & feel like she's a loser...even if she truly is...doesn't change the fact that your BF has a financial obligation to her.

Doing for his son doesn't make his financial responsibility less. Him being on worker's comp doesn't make him less accountable for getting his support paid.

I'd like to interject and say that I, too, felt that comments of spinknottle were not helpful. Maybe not downright nasty but certainly confrontational.
I'm tired of hearing that anything to do with skids and/or BM is "NONE OF MY BUSINESS".
I'd like to hear an explanation for that statement.
My DH and I share a life, which includes money, errands, obligations, issues and, yes, fun stuff. His kids are part of OUR life and that includes all the good and the bad. CS, Alimony, all the extras he has to pay according to the agreement come from MY bank account, too, so yes, it's my business.
Just like it's my DH's business what and when and how much my (bio) kids get to spend. Geeez.

If I were your bf, I would pay the support and do nothing more, seems like BM is a little full of herself, thinking she can force him to pay for camp.. which I do not believe she can make him... besides by the time it goes to court camp will be over.. so let her waste her time.
your bf needs to stop handing over money whenever BM demands it, she is still controling his life, and now yours.. she is dictating how he lives.. and she can not do that.. she no longer has that privelege.. its will be hard for her, but it has to be done or you will be living around her and whatever whim she is on at the moment.. hell next thing you know she will be demanding thousands to send him to space camp or something .. stop it before it gets any further.. if bf has the money and wants him to go to camp they should have talked about it.. but she signed him up and she should pay for it... he cant spend forever paying for things she chooses!!

Ideally he put in writing that he would not pay for the camp. always put that in writing.

if he did, print a copy, forward it with a letter response back the the attorney...quote the section of the decree that states they must agree and say "we did not agree, this is a unilaterally assumed expense by BM and she is responsible."

second, Mass is an earnings capacity state, and if she went back to court they judge should consider her earning potential. problem...they do not HAVE to.

third, is the child under 7? in mass the mother does not have to work full time when the child is under 7.

pay the co-pays. don't argue. in mass it won't fly.

as for the back support from when he had no income, pay it. not paying it will never fly in mass.

my bm is a L-O-S-E-R, too!!! and i am working to do everything i can so dh does not have to give that pos one more dime!

i do agree, if dh's income has not increased, the court should not increase child support....

and if she wants skid to go to camp, then it should come out of her pocket if there was no upfront agreement with bf to go in half.. but that may interfere with her hair & nail funds...

collie ~~ you have every right to feel the way you do ~~ don't be afraid to use that delete button for those who want to bash you for your feelings and frustrations, instead of offering support or advice like you asked in you original post.

From what I have been reading, spinknottle and blendedfam never bring anything useful to the table besides judging the posters. Just read some of their other posts and take what they say with a grain of salt.

It is true. It would be lovely to know exactly how child support is being used, but that just isn't how the systems are set up. That is a whole can of worms that the legal system doesn't want to touch. And, when you consider how long it takes for anything to get through some of these systems with the amount of crap that goes through them now, can you blame them? I understand the frustration and anxiety of helping to pay bills because your SO has child support. I used to be in a relationship with a man who found out he had twins conceived during our relationship six months before we were supposed to get married, and I paid ALL of the rent and for ALL of the supplies for the babies to get set up to have them at our house. I was so angry because all of his money went to child support. I was mad because I saw BM driving a new car in this among other things. When I left that relationship, I felt really angry and regretted the money I'd lost in the situation. At the end of the day, I had to let go of those feelings because I am the one who CHOSE to spend my money that way and stay in the situation. And, as the lawyer told us then, no judge wants to hear you complain about how CS is spent. It only makes them mad. I know that it isn't necessarily what you pictured for yourself, but you need to ask yourself if this is how you want to continue to feel. Absolutely, I agree don't pay for the extras if SO doesn't have the money. But, remember that that is SO's obligation when it comes to child support. If you CHOOSE to pay more in the bills or help finance things for the child, that's your CHOICE with your money. It can be really hard to separate the two when you are trying to build a life with someone. I'm just trying to show you a different way to look at it that helped me.

The other thing I would look at here is where is SS? Who is really taking care of him? Maybe a change in the custody agreement is warranted if she isn't having him. That may actually reduce the child support. I would also suggest helping with the medical stuff. It will just make SO look better in court.