HOLY SH*T....I can't BELIEVE that you allowed it!!! I mean NO offense to you because I know how torn you were and I know (first hand) how hard it can be to make waves w/ the FH, but I really thought you were leaning toward putting your foot down and saying HELL NO. The situation you're in right now...I can't even wrap my mind around it. I'm sorry but I'm hating your FH right now (I think you are too!). Can you get out of this relationship?? No one should have to put up with what you're having to live with right now. Your FH is an ass for letting the BM stay there.

I mean cmon..I can almost understand her staying there if everyone gets along..etc.but to spend time with her, watch movies!! WTF!!!

I go to my Ex's house where him and his new wife live..I talk to the nwe wife..my EX and I barely stand in the same room together. I know if I ever had to crash there I could..but I would never even be alone in the same room with EX out of respect for new wife
"He grew up in my heart, not my belly"

I would NEVER allow it and my DH would never ask that of me. I can't believe your bf had the nerve. I bet he throw a fit if it were your ex asking to stay there and you guys were watching movies together.

Why on earth are you still with this man. I am shocked that you allowed this woman to stay in your house and you b/f is doing this. If you have the money like holly says pack your stuff and get out because it ain't gonna get any better. I just got out of relationship with a man after almost 4 years and it doesn't get any better and Holly just did the same - we know what we are talking about. That is completely unacceptable on so many levels. I'm disgusted by your boyfriends behavior. Really disgusted.

before I'd ever let her stay at my house! I only invite her in when she's getting the kids cause I know it makes her act wierd and the kids see her crazies come out.

"A parents job is to eat as much sh*t as we have to so that the children do not."

Are you saying you will live in an environment that is this toxic to you just because you have a daughter with this boy? And I use that word "boy" deliverately.

Do you think your daughter finds this a fine place to live?

Grow up and face the fact this guy could care less about you and your kid and be more carful about who you pick in the future.

*********************

There's an exception to everything I say.

WTF ?? I find it amazing that these BF allow their EX's-BM to still have control over them the way they do. It is sick! It has to be an epidemic with these men. I have to say my husband was the same way until I came into his life and showed him the right way to deal with the BM,his EX. His EX had him jumping through hoops left and right. I shut that crap down immediatly. Of course now I am this evil B. But you know what in my heart I knew that what the Ex-BM was doing was EXPOLITING my BF for money and anything else she could get at the time. You will find that these EX's and BM are pro's at this kind of behavior. And the sad fact is that the court system allows these woman to do this and rules in there favor. These Ex's lie, cheat and steel if you let them. In our situation we terminated our visits with the SS because of all the lying the EX said, and got away with it in court. Right then I saw the writting on the wall at court when she told so many lies and the judge believed her. I was not going to allow her to put DH or I in a positions to have to prove ourselves in inicent of doing something to the SS. I sat DH down and laid it out for DH and he agreed that this could turn into a bad situation for us. The EX would love nothing more than to have us tied up in a court battle, spending thousands of dollars to protect ourselves from some lying BULLSh-t she made up. Now that all the ties have been cut by me telling her there is no need for her to contact us, she has tried to find ways to worm herself back into our lives and I shut her SH-T down again. Telling her there is no need for any contact unless SS is hurt or sick. SS is 14 yrs old now. If he needs something he can contact us... But he won't because his mother won't let him... It's a power play in her mind, but we don't fall for it....the BM thinks that we need to go through her to be able to speak to the SS. NOT! This started over 3 yrs ago. About every 2-3 months she tries to suck DH in to some sort of drama with an e-mail. I am the one who answers them now. So she knows not to be stupid or try something dumb.... So she doesn't contact DH very often cause she knows she has to deal with me. And she hates that.
Don't let this man and his EX exploit you. And that is just what is happening here. He is using you to take care of his off spring. If it wasn't for you who would be there to take care of her? He could not do it by himself. He could but he wouldn't. Cause it would be to hard !
I don't see this sitaution getting any better unless you make a change. YOU have to make that change in order for something else to change...Meaning I am sure he is happy as a pig in mud right now. I understand you don't have a job and you are going back to school, but that doesn't mean you have to roll over and be his door mat. Set him down and set the standards and the rules together on what is exceptable and what is not...but you have to be honest with yourself on what is exceptable in your life and that you can live with. AND trust me what is happening here with this EX staying in your house, is not exceptable under no circummstances. This is very confussing to the child and is morally wrong. It's like playing house in this childs mind and this child will learn that this is exceptable behavior in adults and when she grows up will allow the samething.Somebody here needs to set the standards and some morals in this family. Trust me if this does work out with your BF and you and he does see what is happening. He will respect you more later as well as this little girl.

Good luck to you and your family.

Apparantly he feels it is okay to have her stay there.... But once he mentioned it to you and you declined - he should have respected your wishes.

After all who the heck is he in the relationship with. She is the X for a reason. If she had made plans to come and see her daughter for the holiday week - then she should have planned for a hotel, gas, food and other expenses.

He is no in a relationship with you and your wishes come before the BM. Bottom line. He can not be in a relationship with you - but put her feelings ahead of yours.

He needs to mature and grow up. BM needs to be responsible for her own way. Dang - what type of example are they showing SD. How to grow up - be immature and be a mooch.

Geez - Louise!!!

bullsh**. absolutely. you are a much better woman than i am. i would be so angry i wouldn't want to be within 500 miles from both of them.

OMG I would NEVER let my fh's EX stay here. I can't even stand to look at her A**.

Get her the heck out. "An X is an X for a reason!" and under no circumstances should she be there. That is confusing for the child. Someone needs to start setting some boundaries...