Desperately needing advice about BM taking SD's to non-stop doctors
I really need your all's advice about my situation. Hopefully someone has been in the same boat or has some good advice. My DH's ex is CONTINUOUSLY taking the SD's for complete bull crap doctor visits. Regular doctors, orthopedists, dermatologists, orthodontists, you name it, they are taken there. 90% of the "ailments" are made up and do not present around us. Both girls have been taken multiple times for knee pain, back pain, stomach pain, neck pain. X-rays are all completely clear every single time. We're talking about a 12 yr old and 10 yr old. SD10 got a bump on her head and a week later BM took her to the doctor for HAIR LOSS because a little bit of hair fell out at the spot.
We are very rarely told about any appointments and the few that we were told about my DH husband said No, that the girl(s) didn't need it and the BM went right ahead and took them on anyway. In the divorce papers it states all non emergent healthcare is to be a joint decision. Payment is 50/50 after insurance pays so she's out of pocket as well.
We just went to court over this and the judge did NOTHING to stop the BM. How can we get this to stop? Should DH start showing up at any and all appointments that he is told about and tell the doctor that he doesn't agree or what? We spoke with a social worker about BM possibly having Munchausen Syndrome by Proxy and she said that the girls could possibly be removed from both homes until they could fully investigate if they deemed it necessary. We obviously do not want to go that route. What can we do?????
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I did a paper on Munchausen
I did a paper on Munchausen Syndrome by Proxy in college. If she starts hurting them to get attention, well you are going to definitely have to take action.
You probably put Nair in it
You probably put Nair in it cause you're a B like that
It's like sitting on a toilet
It's like sitting on a toilet seat and getting gonorrhea.
So... I tried to comment here
So... I tried to comment here and my comment said it was in line waiting for a moderator. Anyone else have that happen?
I said my DH's nephew got
I said my DH's nephew got Ciphilis (spelled wrong intentionally) from a portapotty.
Must have been the STD talk.. I actually got reprimanded for cussing at the Verizon wireless online rep today. I said WTF
BM was like that in the
BM was like that in the beginning with us too. The way we got her to stop was to switch to the higher out-of-pocket copay and less for premium insurance option. Sure, our half of copays were higher but her half of the high bills finally got her to stop.
SuperJew, She hardly bumped
SuperJew, She hardly bumped her head at all but the spot had a little scab so a little tiny piece of hair fell out at the place of the scab which is completely normal but SD10 was immediately taken to the doctor for hair loss. She will look for ANY excuse to take them to a doctor.
JasperPuppy, we documented
JasperPuppy, we documented everything and stopped paying is why we had to go to court. It didn't matter that she violates the divorce decree every time that she does this. The judge offered no other alternative on how to make her stop. If DH was violating the divorce decree they would have thrown the book at him.
Talk to a lawyer immediately
Talk to a lawyer immediately
Tommar I have 2 sons around
Tommar I have 2 sons around the same age and it is not normal behavior to run them to the doctor for the reasons that she is doing it for. I don't drag my sons to non stop doctors and they both play football, basketball, baseball etc. Knee pain in two kids who have been x-rayed with absolutely nothing wrong on the x-rays and the doctors saying there is nothing wrong?? The "pain" doesn't present around anyone but BM. It's all made up!
I am upset about the orthodontist because my husband called and spoke to their dentist and he said that SD12's teeth were perfectly fine and he had NOT referred her to an orthodontist. Which means BM decided on her own to up and take the child to an orthodontist for absolutely no reason.
This is tough. I guess the
This is tough. I guess the only way is to make sure that BM hurts in the pocketbook too.
If his decree states that both parties have to agree on non-emergency visits and she takes the child against his wishes then I would think he would be in the clear to not pay half.
now, I think you will find that this won't pass muster if she asks to take them for a school physical and he says NO. It would seem that would be required treatment the same as annual dental, vision and immunizations that might not be emergency but are routine and necessary. (also generally these checkups are covered 100% by most health plans).
MY YSD was a hypochondriac with her mom. She had MRI of her heart done and lots of other tests at mommies behest. The worst part??? Mom would ignore the bills and we would end up paying 100%.
Can't he just refuse to pay
Can't he just refuse to pay his 1/2 for visits that he had no knowledge of?
Happened to my DH. His EX
Happened to my DH. His EX put his name down without his knowledge. We found a delinquent bill on his credit. I got it straight with the doctor office and they fixed his credit.. but it was a pain.
The person who takes the kid in for service should be billed and responsible. They can bill the ex for their half if it is warranted.
Happened to us as well. It's
Happened to us as well. It's also illegal to do a "slightly tap on pedal" at a stop sign. But that doesn't stop it from happening.
The only thing that stopped
The only thing that stopped this endless crap was for Chef to get a job that didn't pay health benefits; at the time, the Girhippo had gotten a cushy job with the local CPS agency so she had Cadillac gov't health insurance which was practically free.
CS increased to "compensate" (not sure what was to be compensated since the Gir's family health plan was pretty much free) and court switched skids to HER health insurance. But it was so worth it!
No more looking at bills coming in fast and furious through the medical portal, getting stuck with co-pays and her share of co-pays that she refused to pay and put Chef's name on as guarantor--never informing Chef, EVER.
Endless bills for ER visits due to splinters and sniffles. No more finding out after the fact that the Gir had gotten OSS an MRI because he tripped over his own feet in gym class. No more visitations with skids with bandaids on their ears because they had a contest to see who could jam a pencil the farthest up their ear canal (once again, no supervision on the part of MOTY)
Ahhhh bliss after 3 years of Munchausen Express. Of course they did PAS out, but that was an extra bonus for me considering their beast-like behaviour