Guilts gone
So after talking to my mom & filling her in on all the details I feel much better. Lighter. I'm confident I'm doing the right thing for my BD's. They do not deserve the treatment SD13 dishes out. I've made it quite clear our standards of behavior & SD13 cannot seem to be able to adhere to them. I'm not going to have separate rules for our kids - they all have to follow the ONE most important one. Always treat family with respect. Arguments happen no doubt but there's a line you do not cross & she's violated that standard many times. Now she ignores my texts, doesn't want to come to our home. Honestly that's fine with me. Her dad my DH sees her outside our home, at my mother-in-laws & at family parties. I'm not willing to compromise on my values for this little girl. I find it ironic how I'm expected to overlook her violations of my family over & over but when I lose my temper due to her behavior, she cuts us off. I know I know she's 13. She's been given all the power in this scenario. Her parents are willing to stand back & allow her to cut us off. In a way I feel for them- she's unbearable when she doesn't get her way. Not my circus not my monkey. Thank God!!
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No more kids- 4s enough. I'm
No more kids- 4s enough. I'm not completely in the dark as far as mental illness goes but of course you wouldn't know that given you don't really know me.
Well, I would just leave the
Well, I would just leave the door cracked if she wants to come back. My Stepdaughter was a monster at 13 and at 14 and at 15. Now she's almost 17 and she's been on some medication since February. I was probably here once a week complaining about her in the past. Today, I can say it's her 15 year old sister , the one that was the apple of my eye, that is driving me nutso and this SD that caused me so much grief has done a 180 with proper medication. She's taking dual enrollment college courses and brought her grades up to honor roll level from all F's. She has dropped the crazy criminal friends. She is working and getting promoted at work because she is a responsible kid now. She calls and texts and is polite and respectful. She is 17 next month and is completely different then she was at 13. Don't give up hope. You apologized for your part. It is time for others to do their part. She needs help for her bipolar disorder. But seriously, my stepkid's with proper meds and help is COMPLETELY DIFFERENT today. I hope her mom and dad get her therapy and treatment. ,
and you are the parent for your daughters so you have to keep their best interest in heart. and it sounds like you are
That gives me hope thank you.
That gives me hope thank you. She is medicated & has a therapist. I'm hoping down the road they can nail down a true diagnosis & get her on the right meds before it's too late.
What happens if your husband
What happens if your husband ends up with full custody?( mom dies or can longer deal with their kid)
We don't have kids together.
We don't have kids together. I have 2- 15 & 11 & he has 2- 13 & 9.
I said that very thing to him
I said that very thing to him tonight. He & her BM are not capable of guiding her in an effective manner. He's said punishing her only makes it 10 times worse so they would just ignore her to avoid hours long tantrums & destruction. I said she has to learn & be punished for her missteps. If they aren't willing to go through the blow back from that then it's in her best interest for her to be placed somewhere where she will learn. Tough love. If she doesn't learn from those who love her what chance does she have at learning from people who could care less? She'll end up learning in prison. The hard way.
Exactly!
Exactly!
Dup
Dup