Hmmm, opinions please!
Don't know if anyone has dealt with this. Do your skids imitate you? I mean in how they dress, hairstyle and the like. I'm living with a skid who is turning into a teenage version of myself. I have noticed this for a while. I thought it was sweet actually, I'm glad I make a good impact because I'm no style maven but I always dress nice in public. I only buy my clothes in a certain brand. Now that's all skid wears. OK fine, their clothes are great.
I was telling a friend about it and she told me it sounds more like competing than imitation. Recent photo of skid hairdo led her to that assumption. We wear our hair exactly the same way and its nearly the same color. She pointed that out to me. The clothing style I've noticed for a while but not the hair. I had a WOW moment.
It goes beyond clothes and hair and into personality behavior. Things I love to do or are interested in are things that skid is now enamored with. For five years we've had nothing in common and in the last year I'm developing a twin.
I'd also like to add that we are not close. I do not spend a lot of time with skids, I'm a very busy person and on the go a lot. We may sit down for a meal about once a week together, and on rare occasion, may watch a show.
Skids are all about dad at our home and that's great! Not a problem and I'm usually not home anyway. I can't see them competing with me for his attention. Maybe skid is? I don't know whether to be flattered or worried.
Who else deals with this?
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Maybe she thinks if you have
Maybe she thinks if you have more in common such as clothes or hair you will spend more time with her. Don't know the age so its hard to tell. If you don't get the impression that she is competing with you for attention with DH then maybe she just admires you and wants to be like you. I would take it as a compliment until you have signs of anything else.
Fire whore clown red, lmao!
Fire whore clown red, lmao! Do we have the same BM? I'll have to use that again sometime!
Damn, is that the signature
Damn, is that the signature hair color of BMs or something? We've got one of those, too. I keep asking how she can afford to dye her hair if she can't afford to buy her kid a stick of deodorant!
bahahah "fire whore clown
bahahah "fire whore clown red" describes the lip stain BM tried to give SD7.
Yes but I think my younger
Yes but I think my younger SD's do it for a different reason than what you are describing.
Before OSD moved out, she always wanted to imitate, use my things, clothes, perfumes, music.. I had a lot of expensive perfumes and clothes.. but I think she mainly did it to remain the main woman of the house. She helped a lot with the younger kids before I came along and there were some issues with that.
I don't know.. does skid live
I don't know.. does skid live with you? You know how sometimes when you spend a lot of time with someone you tend to pick up habits/traits of that person? Like when we go visit friends in Mississippi (we are Yankees) by the end of the week we are tossing out a Y'all and starting to develop a little twang here and there. The clothes? If you wear popular clothes, then can't really help but have people dressed like you. The hair? Meh, if you have a pretty vanilla hair style, then same thing.
Now if you dress like a hippie chick and have green unwashed hair and wear Frye boots every day and THEN she's doing the same, I might say yeah, she's being a copy cat. Whichever it is, don't they say that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery?
Skid lives with us 70% of
Skid lives with us 70% of time.
Let me rephrase, it's not
Let me rephrase, it's not supposed to be 70% but often times is.
Well it's business casual
Well it's business casual style, not really ideal for a 15 year old and some of the tops are the EXACT same ones I already had.
I used that exact quote when I spoke to my friend about it and on one hand it's flattering, the other it's kind of creepy. I feel awkward a lot around skid, never had much experience with children, didn't really grow up around any, never made it a quest to have my own. With kids I'm just indifferent.
It very well could be that she wants to be a bigger part of my life, just wish I knew. I don't want to ask, that would be weird.
Not quite the same thing but
Not quite the same thing but SD and her mother have decided she's getting a Jeep Wrangler for her first car. I was about to buy one when we got pregnant with DD, so we're waiting till she's two or three-they just aren't practical for a baby. DH laughed when she told him. It's three years out yet so I guess we will see. It feels like well if Sunflower gets one I should get one...
This! Been thru this with
This! Been thru this with skid BM too. Everything we have she tries to copy except the cheaper, smaller version. That's because she's actually too lazy to work.
:/
:/
I don't have the issue with
I don't have the issue with the Skids wanting to wear what I wear...they are all boys hahaha. But I do have the issue with the BM. If we even talk about doing something, she has to do it first and do it better. No matter how big or little it may be. We were given a trampoline...she went and bought a brand new one. We talk about a vacation, she takes them first and for longer, etc. I started having fun with it and planting things all over the house for the SS's to see and report back. So far I have planted an ad for a new car (it worked..they went and bought a new car a week later), A house on the lake, and a several other big ticket items. We hvae no intentions of purchasing any of these things but its fun to watch her try to One-up us...
I have been through this with
I have been through this with BM too. Oh my gosh it was funny. She can't copy my cars or anything like that but I dye my hair a lot. So every time she came for a visit (not very often) I would have had something different done with my hair, she would have tried to make her hair the same color(s) mine was the time before. She even got contacts to make her eyes look like mine.
She tried using the pet names I used for her kids... that just pissed them off. She tried talking like me. That was uber funny especially with big words. bahaha.
When I was pregnant, she was pregnant with twins.. when she found out I really was pregnant (she kept faking pregnancies).. She was having triplets. There is just so much more.
Oddly enough me and SS3 do
Oddly enough me and SS3 do this sometimes. I get dressed before he does in the morning but when he gets up and ready for the day I let him picks his clothes out. He usually picks out clothes similar to what I'm wearing. And if his dad is home then it's whatever he can find that looks like his dads outfit. He likes to match with us. I think it makes him feel like a grown up or special.
I tend to agree with you
I tend to agree with you because she's pretty snarky and semi confrontational at times toward me. Plus she's wedged up dh's ass when she's here. She wants to go everywhere we go!
if you know what I mean! Plus, nothing in this world would make him want BM again and isn't that what every COD wants? Ewww, just NO!
Now I'm not one to take a lot of bs, she's got a great life because of me, but I really try hard not to retaliate because she's a hormonal teen with a crazy BM. That's enough! Plus, I know she lacks friends and is quite introverted.
Competing with me if a lost cause. And you're right, she'd never get on my level!
We were invited by another
We were invited by another couple who are good friends of ours, to go away for the weekend to a major city and watch some live basketball. All we heard was "I want to go!" And I mentioned that we would be going places where kid can't get into, (night clubs) she insisted. Finally I said no! It's a thing for couples and their kids aren't coming, so no! Seriously, what kid would want to? We plan trips all the time when they will not be with us then can't talk about it or act like we went anywhere because she'll be hurt. :sick: