SS9 has been grounded from video games at our house because of his horrible behavior in school since Dec (he's been grounded since Dec, been horrible in school since Pre K)
The deal has always been, if he has an entire week of no bad reports he can play video games that weekend. We went on a week by week basis.
Well the last week of school, he only went for three days and since it's 3rd grade, all they did was party and clean up the rooms. He didn't have any bad reports.
SO now says because SS was good the last week (3 days) he earned his video games back for the entire summer with the caveat that he does workbook pages.
Personally, I think this is a bunch of BS. We did the workbook thing before he was grounded and it was a nightmare. He would do a couple pages, maybe 10 minutes of work and get to play for 1hr. All day it was SS bugging the shit out of us about workbooks and video games.
I got so sick of it that I changed the rules in our house. Do all your chores, behave in school and you get 2hrs a day. I don't have to deal with workbooks and the begging all day long.
Also, I don't think a kid that was a nightmare for the teacher and his parents all year deserves video games all summer because he behaved for 3 days.
I told SO that this was ENTIRELY on him. I don't want to hear one word about video games or workbooks.
His response "I know, He is SS"
WTF does that even mean. He can act like a jackass and get rewarded with little to no effort because he's SS.
I am very old fashioned here. You will all probably think I fell off Noah's Ark. Xbox is earnt in my house on weekends only. I don't care if it's school term or not. TV is a privilege and not a right in my house. Weekends and holiday it's on from 7:30am - 9am then again from 5:50pm-7:15pm. Schools days is 5:50pm-7:15pm only. Otherwise it's play outside or sleep time. If it's raining I have indoor games as well as the kids having umbrella's and wellington boots.
Your SS, the lovely little ducky is a very spoilt little boy. His behaviour in my house would earn him some tommar justice at his age. 5 days of chores and good behaviour would equal 1 hour of gaming on a Saturday and Sunday. Rinse and repeat. You may all tell me how wicked I am now }:)
"talking and horseplay, or fighting and not doing work"
All of these things and throwing a chair at a teacher. Screaming at a teacher, telling the bus driver he was going to stab him and who knows what else because we only get them on the weekends.
Let it go...My SS16 plays video games all day. Gave up fighting it. What did work for us was disconnecting the Xbox everytime he got a bad grade. Every single time he did, DH disconnected it. His report card had 4 A's this time and we do not limit his game use at all anymore. I do not do any of the punishment for this child, it is all on DH. This is not your problem and it can be fixed, but DH has to do it. If he won't why should you care more than he does?
Is he seeing a psychologist or someone? Or are your husband and BM blind to his behavior? If you have been enforcing the video game rule since december and his behavior hasn't improved then sometime soon it may be worth trying a new tactic as this one doesn't seem to be very efficient.
Having said that, giving him some video playing time this weekend for reward for behaving for this week might remind him that he enjoys it and encourage him to behave with whatever system you set up over the summer so that he can play some games.
He is not seeing anyone. BM and SO both blame the other for his behavior (and SO blames his EXSS). He is rarely held accountable for his actions. It's always "Why did you refuse to do your schoolwork today, was it because BM didn't make you go to bed early" "Why did you punch that kid in school, was it because EXSS bullies you" Always someone else's fault.
Oh wow I am in an alternate reality where your SO and mine body swapped to say the same rubbish at one time or another. Mine is a bit better in the last couple of months.
I used to try getting skid off the video games and out in the sunshine to be an active human being but I've given up. Not my monkey, not my circus. If playing video games all freaking day keeps the kid quiet and away from me, sure. I no longer give any shits at all. If your skid can't manage to be a tolerable human being while given free access to video games, then that access should be restricted until he can not behave like an asshole while being allowed to do what he wants.
Comments
Am I right or wrong on
Am I right or wrong on this.
SS9 has been grounded from video games at our house because of his horrible behavior in school since Dec (he's been grounded since Dec, been horrible in school since Pre K)
The deal has always been, if he has an entire week of no bad reports he can play video games that weekend. We went on a week by week basis.
Well the last week of school, he only went for three days and since it's 3rd grade, all they did was party and clean up the rooms. He didn't have any bad reports.
SO now says because SS was good the last week (3 days) he earned his video games back for the entire summer with the caveat that he does workbook pages.
Personally, I think this is a bunch of BS. We did the workbook thing before he was grounded and it was a nightmare. He would do a couple pages, maybe 10 minutes of work and get to play for 1hr. All day it was SS bugging the shit out of us about workbooks and video games.
I got so sick of it that I changed the rules in our house. Do all your chores, behave in school and you get 2hrs a day. I don't have to deal with workbooks and the begging all day long.
Also, I don't think a kid that was a nightmare for the teacher and his parents all year deserves video games all summer because he behaved for 3 days.
I told SO that this was ENTIRELY on him. I don't want to hear one word about video games or workbooks.
His response "I know, He is SS"
WTF does that even mean. He can act like a jackass and get rewarded with little to no effort because he's SS.
The stupid shit you hear in StepHell.
What exactly does "video
What exactly does "video games all summer" mean? Unlimited access? Daily?
I'm thinking still the two
I'm thinking still the two hours a day, but at this point I have no idea.
I am very old fashioned here.
I am very old fashioned here. You will all probably think I fell off Noah's Ark. Xbox is earnt in my house on weekends only. I don't care if it's school term or not. TV is a privilege and not a right in my house. Weekends and holiday it's on from 7:30am - 9am then again from 5:50pm-7:15pm. Schools days is 5:50pm-7:15pm only. Otherwise it's play outside or sleep time. If it's raining I have indoor games as well as the kids having umbrella's and wellington boots.
Your SS, the lovely little ducky is a very spoilt little boy. His behaviour in my house would earn him some tommar justice at his age. 5 days of chores and good behaviour would equal 1 hour of gaming on a Saturday and Sunday. Rinse and repeat. You may all tell me how wicked I am now }:)
"talking and horseplay, or
"talking and horseplay, or fighting and not doing work"
All of these things and throwing a chair at a teacher. Screaming at a teacher, telling the bus driver he was going to stab him and who knows what else because we only get them on the weekends.
They have chores they get
They have chores they get paid an allowance for.
Let it go...My SS16 plays
Let it go...My SS16 plays video games all day. Gave up fighting it. What did work for us was disconnecting the Xbox everytime he got a bad grade. Every single time he did, DH disconnected it. His report card had 4 A's this time and we do not limit his game use at all anymore. I do not do any of the punishment for this child, it is all on DH. This is not your problem and it can be fixed, but DH has to do it. If he won't why should you care more than he does?
Is he seeing a psychologist
Is he seeing a psychologist or someone? Or are your husband and BM blind to his behavior? If you have been enforcing the video game rule since december and his behavior hasn't improved then sometime soon it may be worth trying a new tactic as this one doesn't seem to be very efficient.
Having said that, giving him some video playing time this weekend for reward for behaving for this week might remind him that he enjoys it and encourage him to behave with whatever system you set up over the summer so that he can play some games.
He is not seeing anyone. BM
He is not seeing anyone. BM and SO both blame the other for his behavior (and SO blames his EXSS). He is rarely held accountable for his actions. It's always "Why did you refuse to do your schoolwork today, was it because BM didn't make you go to bed early" "Why did you punch that kid in school, was it because EXSS bullies you" Always someone else's fault.
Oh wow I am in an alternate
Oh wow I am in an alternate reality where your SO and mine body swapped to say the same rubbish at one time or another. Mine is a bit better in the last couple of months.
I used to try getting skid
I used to try getting skid off the video games and out in the sunshine to be an active human being but I've given up. Not my monkey, not my circus. If playing video games all freaking day keeps the kid quiet and away from me, sure. I no longer give any shits at all. If your skid can't manage to be a tolerable human being while given free access to video games, then that access should be restricted until he can not behave like an asshole while being allowed to do what he wants.