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Really BM REALLY!?!?!?!

Learning to Stepparent's picture

Submitted by Learning to Ste... on Sun, 05/03/2015 - 5:49pm

So I went to pick SD up from visiting her mother and as she is climbing out of the car BM says "do you want to take your sprite?" SD says yes so BM hands it to me and I looked at SD and said "how about we switch it out for water?" I looked at BM and said "with all the dental work SD has had the dentist said not to give her any pop." Actually, at 5 years old SD has had 12 cavities filled, 1 abscessed tooth, 2 root canals, 3 silver caps, and has another 3 silver caps scheduled because the dentist said it was the best way to protect her teeth and she needs all the help she can get.

BM responds with "well, the dentist I talked to said it was ok to give her pop or apple juice as long as she eats when she drinks it." Are you fucking kidding me?!?!?! I was so pissed. It isn't BM holding SD's hand as she is having massive dental work done or dealing with the fall out after the work is done it's me.

I wonder if she would be so quick to give her pop if she had to watch the results.

Comments

Learning to Stepparent's picture

Submitted by Learning to Ste... on Sun, 05/03/2015 - 5:59pm

Yes, DH is custodial and BM lives about 200 miles away.

So we take her to the dentist to get all the work done as well as any other appointments. BM really doesn't show up to anything.

Also, BM won't take her for her scheduled visitation if SD has had dental work that day or is sick. Basically, any time there is actual parenting involved she won't take her.

Learning to Stepparent's picture

Submitted by Learning to Ste... on Sun, 05/03/2015 - 6:10pm

I'm kind of thinking if she didn't make the entire thing up she told the dentist "oh she has one cavity can I still give her some pop." I immediately threw the sprite out, marched right into the gas station to buy her some bottled water and made her rinse her mouth out right there and I don't give two shits if BM saw me do it or not.

I'm sorry but a 5 year old with that amount of dental work is tantamount to abusive neglect in my book.

And yes, she is delusional.

Learning to Stepparent's picture

Submitted by Learning to Ste... on Sun, 05/03/2015 - 6:17pm

We were given that option.

We did that a year and a half ago when she had 11 cavities filled at once. We would have considered it this time but we were told the waiting list for that was pretty long and at the time she had an abscessed tooth and we wanted to get everything started to avoid the problems becoming more severe.

Learning to Stepparent's picture

Submitted by Learning to Ste... on Sun, 05/03/2015 - 8:48pm

I have a similar problem your youngest does. Severe crowding on top and bottom.

In SD's case it was neglect. She was given a bottle until she was 3 years old, she was put to bed with a bottle of milk until about the same age. Her mother gives her all kinds of junk and candy and she didn't see a dentist until DH got custody almost 2 years ago.

Basically, she has bottle rot.

ltman's picture

Submitted by ltman on Sun, 05/03/2015 - 8:11pm

Why would a 5yo need that amount of dental work on teeth that are going to fall out anyway? Does your dentist have a new bass boat?

I didn't go to the dentist until I was 14 to get a baby tooth pulled. I had my first cavity filled at 42.

Learning to Stepparent's picture

Submitted by Learning to Ste... on Sun, 05/03/2015 - 8:50pm

Well, she already had one abscessed tooth. She was on penicillin for 10 days and needed a child's version of a root canal to take care of that. Those can actually be fatal if left untreated.

If they pull the baby teeth with cavities she would pretty much be left with her front incisors which would make chewing her food somewhat difficult. She needs caps on her teeth to protect what is left of the teeth in order for them to last long enough for her adult teeth to come in and prevent any more abscesses.

momandmore's picture

Submitted by momandmore on Mon, 05/04/2015 - 10:00am

Ugh. BM does this with YSD every time she comes to visit. Always trying to get her to drink out of her big gulp of pepsi. The first 2 times I spoke up and said she wasn't allowed to have pop (she was going through some dental work as well).

BM has tried every time since then and SD will shake her head no and tell her she isn't allowed to have it or she just wants her milk. bhaahah. BM gets mad at the response from SD. BM just wants to be the fun parent and act like when she is here our rules don't apply.

It was extremely hard to break SD's of drinking after other people too. Ehh. :sick: