I can relate to this. Bm never takes sd8 for a haircut. When I came on the scene,I pointed out what a rat's nest her hair was. It was awful..all tangled and never really brushed properly or cared for. I told dh that because bm isn't taking care of it,he should. He takes her for her haircuts and bm bitches about it. Dh told her she should take her every couple of months but bm couldn't be bothered. She complains when dh does it,claiming it's a mom job,but won't take sd8 for a damn haircut. Ridiculous. I told dh to make sure sd8 hair needs are met. Other kids will make fun of her matted gross hair at school.

We were all set to have xmas pics done one year. The skids knew in advance. SD11 (9 at the time) shows up with an awful, crooked haircut. I don't know if Bm was trying to cut it herself or had it cut awful on purpose just to mess up the pictures. I really don't care what they look like in the picture... I don't get in the picture.. just the 2 skids and our BS3. If she wants her kid to look like crap all it does is hurt the kid.

Be careful. My daughter 11 had a friend over this weekend. They wanted to spray their ends blue. I have the spray on wash out color. But I said no. Even though it shampoos right out, that's just something you stay out of. Moms and daughters and hair.

BM has no say in what you do to SD's hair. BM lost that right all by herself.

Our BM (when she did have say) didn't ever mention hair cuts or anything like that until she found out I was the one trimming and doing layers. Then it was WW3.

I don't think SD has had a haircut in the 5 years I've known her. BM has her convinced she should grow it to eternity I guess. One way to save money. It's so long, it's always in snarls and never combed. It was washed, combed, and braided for our wedding but that's been the only time. Probably because it's the only time I got involved. DH doesn't seem to care so I guess it's all good. Growing up I was told if I didn't keep it clean and neat, it would be cut to a length that I could keep clean and neat. Some of these skids could use that rule.

I asked my Exh to not cut the kids hair but my kids begged me to tell him I would have it done, after several BAD BAD haircuts from his GF, well now exGF.

Now that GF is gone, kids dont care, neither do I, long as they are happy.

Now DH has a hair thing. DH says girls should have long hair, that was the agreement with DH and BM from day they were born. Both SDs have really long hair, BM found out I was pregnant after DH told the SDs over the phone, 3 days later BM texts DH a picture of both of them with the same lopsided justin bieber short hair cut. DH lost his mind. We were due to get married that weekend, so now DH has to see his daughter with short short hair in our pics.

It was a ploy to punish DH, it was the 1 thing DH didn't want BM to do and guess what she did it. I told him, let it go, move on and she'll stop playing that game and go on to something else. She did. Both girls now have long hair again, knotted, unwashed, untamed rats nests. BM can't wash their hair because she's too fat to bend over. LOL DH's words not mine. Yes BM still gives SD's a bath at 11 and 8 years old people, obviously like only once a week though.

The only time the SDs have had their hair washed, cleaned was for our wedding and family christmas pictures 2 years ago. I am now disengaged. They smell, wear the same underwear, dont bathe, brush their teeth or brush their hair. I walk behind or in front of that group if we go anywhere and act like I dont know them. If people look at me, I mouth, NOT MY KIDS and point at DH. }:)

I forgot to mention that SD's both had boy cuts until I moved in. That was BM's way of handling the lice she was too lazy to get rid of. BM dyed her hair to control hers.