Hey zero, he's the first of 3 so far and he's very good on the outside with SS9, who he shares a mom with. However, at times it seems like he still has issues getting over not being the only one. Case in point, a couple months ago, he starts talking randomly about how he remembers when him and SO watched all the episodes of a certain cartoon and SS9 says "Oh I remember" and SS15 tells him that this happened before SS9 was born "when it was just me and Daddy". Of course, SS9 looks hurt because it was never just him and Daddy but this is a small example of who SS15 is at times. I also feel like he kind of overcompensates on the outside to hide whats going on inside. Like he'll put a pic up on his phone of SS4 as a screensaver to get "good" attention from SO.
As for the onesie, it's a onesie snow coat thing. Like a coat thats a onesie. I was just looking at it, I don't think I'm going to get it because I know she'll outgrow it fast and its pricey. But the truth is, I'm already 7 months and have only bought her a blanket. My friends and family have probably bought me enough clothing for the first year so that's kind of the excuse I have in my head IF I were to decide to get it, which again, I don't think I'll practically go ahead and do. I feel like I can probably splurge on one little thing, but then again, I know I can put the money to better use! The point for me though is that I normally do not shop expensive at all (my registry is a Walmart one), but it feels like SS15 is tallying everything up in his head of what he *thinks* his dad is giving to the baby and I don't let him know it, but this is actually *my* personal savings I was going to use for my own kid. I'm just so tired of these random moments of competition!

I love this too. I really wish I would have thought of this one. This would give him incentive on not to even think along those lines.

SO can be very selective about what he wants to believe about SS15 because I think he has some residual guilty parenting thing going on plus SS15 is very good at manipulating him, shit I think sometimes he even manipulates me into thinking "he's not such a bad kid". Only difference is, I pay attention to those not so innocent questions and remarks SS15 makes and I know how to read between the lines. I just hope it doesn't take tragedy for SO to see what this kid can be capable of. I'm going to protect mine to the full extent but I can't say the same of the others.

Kath, SS9 even knows! SS9 was there when SS15 asked that, after we all said what we said he said "Daddy will kill you if you do that" and SS15's response was kinda like "I Know, I was just asking". I honestly don't know if he was trying to be funny or what, but I'm not stupid and even if that was his idea of humor, it doesn't come from a good place. At all. Like I said, it feels sometimes like it's going to take something huge for SO to see what he's supposed to in regards to SS15 but time will tell what that thing will be. Like I said, I'm protecting my daughter with all I can.

Daizy, with skids, I'm realizing that they don't know a lot of things MOST 4 year olds already know. If I start a list on that it would fill another blog!

This is what I'm hoping will happen. One of my younger brothers was born when I was 14 and my older brother was 16. My older brother was not happy at all, but when the baby was born, he completely changed. I'm hoping this will be the case with SS15, but I won't be leaving the baby with him anytime soon, not even for a minute.

This is SO's first daughter. He has 3 boys already. I agree that SS15 is dropping hints. I think it would have been similar whether or not it was a girl or boy because it almost seems like he feels entitled to all of DH's finances (which is not much lol). Again, he will give the right cues most of the time by saying things like "I'm going to buy her everything, I can't wait til she's born", but I notice things. I notice when I get gifts for her in the mail, he notices but doesn't pay attention at all. I feel like he tries to act like he's not watching but he does just to see what the baby got then won't comment on it. Whereas SS9 will act the complete opposite. He even color coordinated her clothing the other day and put them on hangers! :jawdrop:

Jenny, SS4 is supposed to be coming to visit in 2 weeks for a month. I'm sure more of who SS15 is will come out for SO to see. I am definitely watching my back with that kid. I had a pretty good relationship with BM2 until I got pregnant and engaged, but even she admitted that the relationship deteriorated because of SS15 (then SS10 at the time) and she said she would sleep with one eye open after she gave birth. When I first met SO, SS15 stole from me (not sure if I blogged about it), and he didn't believe it at first, but then discovered 10 bucks in SS's stuff the 3rd time money was taken from my purse and SS admitted it. I know that it's a process and SO is coming around slowly, and I think what happens with him is that I tell him so many of the things that happen at home that he probably gets overwhelmed with the way he knows deep down SS15 is becoming. He has a weekly "talk" with SS15 usually behind something I tell him, but I think this one was a bit much for him.

You couldn't pay me to! That kid is not staying with my baby alone. Ever. Point blank period. I'm looking into a nanny cam as we speak.

So what would be some suggestions? So far, I know for a fact that I'm NOT leaving my baby with him at all unsupervised. I spoke to SO about this already in the case that baby is with him and he even so much as thinks of leaving her with SS15 for even a minute or two. I know that there are signs that SS15 has issues, I just don't know if this is "normal" for stepfamilies. He's also in a special ed class if that makes any difference. His mom is a POS who as of last month has suspended supervised visits until January's court date so I know he already probably deals with clinging onto "daddy" in a different way than another kid.
I wrote before that one of my older brothers said he didn't want our younger brother to be born and he said he would hate him no matter what...at 16 years old. Now he's the best big brother ever. I can only hope that this is one of those things for SS15 where he may feel a certain way now but grow out of it as the baby grows and he begins to love her. If not, then time will tell and we will have to deal with it as necessary.