Get there about 9.15am (needed to be there at 9.30) parked in the car park and he is right opposite me. Walks in just as I am getting out of my car.

There is a queue inside a mile long for intervention orders, all parties have to line up and be checked off as being present, so I walk to the back of the line - slowly.... But am still right behind him, I wait back and allow a few people in between.

The DV lady arrives and we chat, she tells me what will happen and not to worry about a thing, she talks to the police (they talk to both parties and I am given a court prosecutor (well not me as *I* didn't bring the case the police did - but she represents me for them I guess?) The police talk to me, talk to him, talk to the DV lady, he talks to legal aide, I talk to my legal representative (one of these IS appointed for me)

I have been told to ask the police rep to talk to him re his intentions re paying any/all of the mortgage this week as I am not allowed to. The police rep does and comes back to me - apparently he has told them all that HE owns the house on his own I have no share in it - he bought it and I just live there with him, it's 100% his.... (all BS) and that he will consent to the full order on the condition that I leave the house immediately.

I cannot believe he is trying this! I am just so shocked - I never thought he would go this low.... famous last words, and I never imagined in my wildest nightmares a LOT of this crap happening with him so.

The DV lady and my rep talk to me again, and say if he contests it means it just goes to a further hearing in a month or so, that the temp order remains and all the conditions remain. Ok. They ask if he does own the house etc - no. Is my name on the title - yes, well then he has no leg to stand on and don't worry about it. He will still only be allowed to the house with a police person, and me present and may ONLY take what I allow - his personal possessions - nothing household unless I ok it. MY car is actually in his name only I don't remember how/why. I ask about that and they say he cannot do anything but report it as stolen - and if the police turn up with that claim all I have to say is "family court issue" and they will leave. They also said that these are his power plays and attempts to control things - now that I am no longer in the situation and able to be manipulated by him he is going to these lengths to still have power over me. And NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS IF HE BREAKS THE ORDER REPORT IT, FIRST TIME EVERY TIME, because even if it's "I'm sorry, I love you" which at some point it will be - if I allow it and not report it opens the door, and at some point it will go back to being "not nice" and who knows what he will do.

So. We wait some more, I hear him talking to a policewoman about whether HE can get an intervention order against me as well... she says he would have to apply separately.

Finally we go in, I sit behind the court prosecutor, he sits at the table across from her.

The judge accepts that he is contesting the order, but seems shocked that he is also contesting the interim order, asks why, he says he needs to be allowed back in the house as he is living out of his car pretty much.

The judge says he needs more info to decide and I have to take the stand (I was assured I wouldn't need to and am slightly freaked out at having to do this) I swear in and the judge asks me for background on what happened, I lay it out as briefly as I can - but with less hesitation and waffling about what his intentions were on the stairs, I was clear that he attempted to push me down them and that he was yelling and trying to get to dd12 and that I used everything I had to keep him from getting past me on those stairs, there was no way in hell he was getting past. (It's a lot clearer now that the fog and shock of what happened have cleared - he grabbed me and was shaking me, she screamed at him to stop hurting me, I told her it was ok and to go to her room {she didn't} he continued pushing and twisting me trying to push me down the stairs, I fought back and she kept screaming, when I started trying to get at her over me I pushed him and punched him (face, shoulder, chest and twice in the nuts - must have been poor blows as he didn't flinch) but it held him back, and all the time I was telling him he had to leave, he had to go.

I tell about what led up to it, and that my kids locked in their room I monitored what/where he was from reasonable distance - close enough if he started with them, but far enough to not be in danger, I told about sd smirking in the car and that I went out and told her off, and the end bit where he lost it again about his photos and shoved me back from the door into the wall, and that's where I called the police etc.

I was pretty shaky, but did ok. The judge asked me if there was any chance of reconciliation (NO), did I want the order as it stood or amendments where he could move back in but just not be violent (NO) Have there been incidents before (YES) Why did I want the order, "because he has really scared me and I just want to feel safe"

I go and sit and he is asked to stand - he goes to "take the stand" and the judge says no, where he is is fine (important detail - not sworn in to tell the truth etc) The judge asks again why not? Because he has nowhere else to go, it's HIS house not mine, and he should be the one entitle to live there etc, look to me - no not true, my name is on title too. Ok. He tries to talk about how I am abusive to his kids (despite what others here would say I have NEVER abused those kids, I have taken so much shit from them and kept on smiling and being nice and waiting for that bastard to deal with them. this ONE day was the only time I have spoken out to SD, I have told ss twice, once I told him after repeated requests nicely to "shut the bloody door when you use the toilet no-one wants to see you pee!" and the second time in January this year when he threatened to punch dd12 in the face and EX-OH again refused to deal - when I told him "If you EVER put your fist in my daughters face again I will fucking deal with you myself!" Yes, wrong to swear - but this was so not ok.

Ummm where was I. OH yeah, they are terrified of me because I am abusive to them all the time, he has a recording

Judge cuts him short and says was it recorded at the time of this attack (no after) well then it is irrelevant, it did not provoke the attack or have any impact on it.

He gets pissy and tries again - irrelevant move on.

Judge listens with growing impatience as he spouts nonsense - I supposedly called SS11 and BND "dumbarses" - that is NOT an expression I have used before I heard this today in court - I did gasp quite loudly and say that is NOT true,

Through most of it I was just like "no, that's not true, that never happened" or shaking my head in utter disbelief and what he was saying, the judge kept up with "irrelevant to the matter at hand" and I think he could tell it was all rubbish.

So, temp order maintained, have to go back on 18/12 for hearing re full order.

He asks judge can he come to the house and get his stuff as he has "a lot of stuff here" (no he doesn't he left BM with barely anything and lived as a boarder in fully furnished places til he moved in with me - so not a lot of stuff) Judge said he may come only in presence of a police officer and is only allowed to take personal items and what I say is ok. He says "what about the car? She is driving MY car I paid for it and I want it back?"

At this point I burst out "WE paid for it together, and my parents just paid out $3500 to rebuild the engine!" (court prosecutor says to me "It's ok, don't bite, don't let him get to you" I say no more just sit there in shock.

Judge says "family court matter (LMAO) take it up with them"
Oh - DD's were added to order as well, so it covers all three of us.

He tries again with more. judge cuts him off and explains in great detail the terms of the order - NO contact, no violence to person or possessions. no getting others to contact, no threats, no intimidation or actions designed to stress or upset or otherwise harm the applicant etc, not by word, action, etc, not by electronic means (email/text) or social media - he made it clear - if he or even SD14 type even a nasty status update on FB about me he can go to jail. We are told to wait in foyer and collect our copies of order from reception when names are called.

He leaves the courtroom, I am distressed and break down a bit when he's out of the room, prosecutor says, it's fine take your time, don't worry. I get up to go but he is standing in the antechamber which is tiny, so I tell her and she says to wait. Eventually he leaves into the foyer and takes a seat opposite the door. I go out and into the ladies, where I try to compose myself, walk back through foyer and sit around a corner with my back to him - he can see me but I can't see him. Checking my messages as I have some texts and missed calls (am waiting on locksmith) while I am sitting there I hear a voice, like someone has their phone on speaker and turned up full blast, the voice is low but obviously upset, I hear the word bitch but am not really paying attention, I think to myself that's someone elses business and just don't upset them by looking - you know? Eventually more seeps into my head though

the words "Next time you want to call me a whore have the guts to do it to my face..."

I realise it's SD's recording of me and turn, he is sitting there smirking at me and looking well pleased with himself, I run to the foyer and ask for security and tell them what is happening. They get the PSO's who come and talk to him and get the tablet he is playing it on, one stays with him the other talks to me. I tell that we have just had the order made, awaiting paperwork and he is attempting to intimidate me. Two ladies who were in the foyer have walked past me at some point and wait outside, they tell us they heard it all and were really kind to me. PSO's get police officers (police station next door) and we cannot take the tablet, but need proof of the recording and that he played it - one of the PSO's listens to the recording for verification of what he was playing (in case he deletes it later) and the other gets the contacts for the ladies outside, they were only too happy to give statements - one said "he was sitting there with a shit eating grin on his face while he played it!"

So, taken to the police station, no one is clear if he has breached to order as he technically hasn't been given a copy. Ok. but they have records of his behaviour all over the place now and it will be brought up in court when we go back. They walk me to my car and say be very careful, be vigilant in the streets around your house, and call 000 and the first sign of any problem - do not hesitate etc.

I call the DV lady and see if she can get the locks done tonight as now I am scared and given his behaviour so far today I do not think he won't do it. I can't say any more that he is not like that, he is REALLY a good person etc. I have no more excuses and I have to accept that he really is just abusive.

Anyway, she is incensed that they wouldn't charge him and asks me if I want them to, at first I vacillate and say I don't want to cause him trouble - and she says "remember what I said about breaking the order? and THIS wasn't even NICE!" And I say OK, yes, do it. He needs to understand that this is serious and that I am serious.

So, I have no locks changed yet, it's 10.14pm and the girls are asleep and I am jumping at every noise.

The Brightside? - gotta find that silver lining - after that shit he pulled today the full order should be granted without any hassle!