Another pathetic attempt by BM to manipulate, control, push boundaries...
DH forwards an email from BM to me yesterday afternoon:
"Since you had SD last year for Halloween, it would only be fair if I had her this year. Especially taking into account that you haven't signed our agreement since June which would have cleared this issue up. Our proposed time was X to X every other year. Again, since you had last year, this year would be mine. That's just fair. You can come with if you'd like :)"
#1 DH did not have SD for Halloween last year. A quick look at any calendar can tell you that.
#2 DH filed the custody modification & his attorney drafted it & sent it to BM. We have been waiting for her to sign it since last March or so. We have also filed 2 motions since then to try to get the judge to force her to sign.
#3 No where in their old CO or the as yet unsigned new one is Halloween even mentioned. Nor is it a holiday that is divided up per our state custody guidelines. In the past, SD just spends it with whichever parent she is with. Which has been BM 4 of the last 5 years. Does that sound "fair" to you?
#4 Neither DH nor myself have any idea where BM is getting the proposed times & switching years. This has never been discussed in court, mediation or personally between them.
#5 The fact that BM mentions twice in her email what is "fair" is laughable. In her mind, fair is only what benefits her. She has SD EVERY Christmas, yet DH has never bitched or moaned that it not fair. Which it's not, but telling her would do no good & the court is on her side.
#6 Stop asking my husband to hang out with you!!! We both hate you & would rather die than spend another minute in your presence!
Of course DH just answered her back with a simple No, I did not have SD last year. Please check your calendar. Besides, we already have a costume & plans. Also, you need to speak to your attorney re: the CO & signing it.
First she immediately replied back with a nasty message about the CO. Then, a bit layer with:
"Oops, sorry, my bad. Guess I did have SD last year. Can I come trick or treating with you guys?"
Arghh!! Head, wall, repeat.
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I can't remember exactly. DH
I can't remember exactly. DH only forwarded the first one to me, I read the others off his phone when I got home. But there was name calling involved. DH made the comment "nice, crazy, nice - I think I have whiplash" Since her emails were so sweet when asking for something yet so hateful when defending herself.
And yes, she is totally serious. Ever since she broke up with her BF about 2 months ago, she has been trying to be very "friendly" with DH. Even visiting him at work (see my last couple blogs on that one). She is also sacking up to MIL lately. It drives me nuts, but if MIL wants to get involved with her crazy, that's her loss. I've disengaged from the MIL battle.
I am working Friday night. If I find out that BM joins DH, SD & MIL for trick or treat, I will lose my damn mind. I really hope I do not have to tell DH that.
Yep, I already predicted that
Yep, I already predicted that the crazy train would go off the rails the minute she didn't get what she wanted. I'm sure her friendly attitude of late will change if she is not allowed to trick or treat with my hubby. DH still seems to believe it's possible that she can change. Poor stupid naive DH.
What a freak!! Don't let her
What a freak!!
Don't let her come with you guys it will ruin you and Dh's time with SD.
Yeah, I am working that
Yeah, I am working that night. DH told me he was simply not even going to answer her (case he's afraid to say no). I am not saying a word. DH knows how I feel. We had a come to jeezus fight 2 weekends ago about boundary issues. So if I come home & find out that BM joined them, I am done. DH can pack his shit & go live with her if they want to be a family so damn bad.
Hi meerkat, I'm responding to
Hi meerkat, I'm responding to all your posts here.
BM is 38 but is severely NPD/BPD. As such, she does act like a selfish toddler with no boundaries. I would be so embarrassed to ask an ex if I could join him at an event, especially after he made it clear that he already had plans. She is so pathetic.
As for my DH responding, the ball is really in his court. Like I posted earlier, we had a knock down, drag out argument a couple weeks back which was mainly over the boundary issues. He is well aware of where I stand. I made it very clear at the end of our discussion that I did not sign up to be a sister - wife and that any further intrusions by BM that he allowed would be result in a separation, if not a divorce. This is his chance to show me if he is in this for the long haul. If he takes this opportunity to take his balls back from BM & MIL, then he will be rewarded very kindly. But I feel no need to remind him how I feel about this issue. Trust me, he knows.