this is easy.....a Skid that never existed.....the end.... }:)

One that doesn't act like our house is a motel.

I think you are right that a lot of skid behavior is just kids being kids. I can't complain too much about my skids, they annoy me sometimes but if we're being honest, my DH annoys me sometimes and so do my own bios.

I could not accept being called names, blatantly being told no, being disrespected to my face, or downright entitlement (I don't have to clean because I don't live here)- I would fully disengage as most of the smoms on here have.

One that doesn't keep fucking around with my husband's feelings. I love you, I hate you, I want to spend all my time with you, I want to stay as far away from you as I can, I'm skipping my visit with you this weekend.

I know all kids go through this stage but I think that children of divorce need to step it up a little. I know, it's not fair to expect that from them but they hold a lot of power over guilty parents and they know it. They are smarter than people give them credit for. The onus is also on them to make the relationship work and to not abuse the emotional fragility of their parents.

I wish SD13 was a bit more grateful. She isn't a bad kid per say, she's really just in need of some serious direction and parenting. What makes me the most upset about her is that at our house she has her own room, a very beautiful room at that, whereas in BM's, she sleeps with BM on the SAME bed with her because she doesn't have a BED.
Yet, she isn't the least bit grateful. I'm not sure why she is so desensitized but it upsets me a bit. Other than that, she's really not a bad kid and I can deal with her just fine so far.
There is no such thing as a perfect kid, Lord knows my Bio's are anything but.

I love my skids so they are fine the way they are. The only thing I would like to see change is SS9’s "know it all" attitude and his non-stop talking, but he may grow out of that

My SS is a really good Skid. He is loving, smart, funny, honest, dependable, even reliable, open minded, loves animals and kids, great sense of humor, easy going, cheers you up if your down, and he is a wonderful young man with a lot of potential.

His downfalls are his lack of good hygiene, such a momma's boy that he will blow his dad off, can be arrogant at times, he is messy, and he's not my son but I wish he was.

My SD has her issues but her attitude in life is the worst I have ever seen from anybody. She only cares about watching tv, playing her favorite games, pigging out on certain foods, and nothing else or anybody that I know of. What I do like about her is that she can be a good person if she wanted too, she can be pretty if she cared, and that's all I can think of right now.

A dream Skid would be one like my SS or a dog.

SD7 is a pretty good kid. She annoys me like any other 7 year old would but I have no issues with her. When I feel like it we hang out. I'm like a cool aunt to her or a big sister.

The problems in steplife, for us, are from BM. Not from SD.

The perfect step kid is one that does what he is told to do!

My SD22 was a good kid. Pretty quiet, well behaved and respectful.

She had a bout of insanity at about 15 (spurred on by BM, no doubt) but I really never had any problems with her personally.

She is not very smart and quite lazy, and I do wish she would make better decisions but she doesn't live with me so, not my problem.

She does lie and try to manipulate my husband but she's not good at it and gets nowhere so again, not a problem.

I would just like a better life for her than what I think she is going to end up with.

My SDs, thankfully, are good kids. To me, how the kids act reflects their parenting. If they're not getting the guidance they need, there's a greater chance they won't act right. Some people let their kids get away with murder and never change that or make those changes too late. My SDs were young when they moved in with us so DH was able to start giving them the guidance and support they need.

I can tolerate messes and mistakes that kids make. I can also tolerate skids mistakes that we all make as humans.

SS14 isn't a bad kid per se. He lies a lot, he's sneaky, he doesn't care about school or hygiene, and he's lazy as the day is long, but he's generally pretty respectful and polite. He helps around the house when we ask him to. He's a nice kid overall. But boy, the lying and laziness irritate the crap out of me. Those are two qualities I can't stand in a person, any person. I guess I really can't complain. I've got it good compared to what a lot of you are going through!

In my situation the skids are good kids, just the product of craptastic lack of parenting. BM uses the skids as her bestest buddies and then expects them to respect her. These issues carry over to our home. They believe that they are entitled to know adult issues in our home.

Conflicts arise when they do something that I deem unacceptable behavior from ANY child and DH sees the same behavior as normal. I bow out and he can handle but he does know that I disagree with the consequences given. He has come around as he has seen the way I handle things get better results.