Not sure if I handled this right or not
So this weekend was terrible for me. Yes pity party was thrown. I have been really sick with the flu and I still didn't feel good this weekend. SD3 came over, meaning I have to take care of bioson (2months old) by myself because SO gets blinders on when she is there. Normally I don't mind having to take care of him by myself, he is my son. But I could have used some help as I was still recovering from being sick.
All I wanted this weekend was to be left alone. For the past few weekends I have heard how I'm mean to mommy, mommy wants to hurt me in some way, mommy says I shouldn't paint her nails etc. I know SD is 3 but god damn it's sooo annoying to hear all effing weekend. Since I wasn't feeling well and I really didn't want to listen to this, I made myself scarce. Me and bioson were mostly in his room this weekend. SO had to do all the cooking, Boo hoo for him. (insert eye roll) Now since I disengaged mostly this weekend, I was told that I "hate" SD and I'm so mean to her. I flipped out, I told SO that I don't feel good, I am taking care of OUR son by myself and I just want to be left alone. I'm tired of hearing about "mommy" all gd weekend. These are my two days off from work and mostly, I'm miserable when she is here. Then I get told I'm being dramatic etc.
So I feel like I was just trying to not be around them by disengaging? SO saw this as me being mean? And how do I deal with the "mommy doesn't....." comments cause they are getting really annoying and making me not even want to be there anymore. I see it as, it's only going to get worse.
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Non committal answers? Hmmm/
Non committal answers? Hmmm/ Really?/ Interesting/ Sorry not interested.
I love how the 'mean' card is pulled out. I think men think by using this line it will make us become the all loving Earth mother he wants for his child/ren. Who wants to be the child-hating stepmother?
You COULD tell SD "I am sure mommy has an opinion about lots of things. I don't know your mommy so you shouldn't be talking about her to me. It is like telling secrets."
"Why? Because I refuse to put
"Why? Because I refuse to put up with SS's sh*t?"
And the "My mom hates you!" card (which I also get repeatedly) is getting old. Of COURSE your mom hates me - I'm living in the nice house with the fully-stocked refrigerator and the full bank account AND I don't have to deal with CAS on a regular basis or hide my DH from them!
Anyway, stepmothers are supposed to be "mean", aren't they? That's the automatic title we get once we get involved with a man with kids from a previous relationship/one-night stand/moment of lonely desperation.
oh i get the "rude" comment
oh i get the "rude" comment all the time.
i'm sorry i'm not riveted the 83rd time yss asks a "what if?" question- yes i'm going to look irritated, CUZ I AM!
yes i'm going to sound frustrated when i have to ask mss to throw his paper plate out and put his cup in the sink after five years - CUZ I AM!
and yes i'm gonna look po'd when yss marches downstairs, gives me the "why are you still here?" look, sighs, goes back upstairs, and repeats this three or four times - CUZ I AM!
i'm so rude, it's awful... yes they tell eachother "shut up (insert slur)", or threaten to hit dh, or yell at him "nooo i dont waaant toooo!!!!". and i'm rude? :?
Same here! I'm a bitch
Same here! I'm a bitch because I am not swooning over the skids.
YSD14 once told me all snotty "OSD HATES you". I said "Well the feeling is mutual." OSD is an adult. I dont care if she HATES me. She hates me why? Because I dont kiss her ass or the ass of her sisters? Because I demand respect, rules, boundaries and sensability in my own home? Because I dont let people (kids at that!) walk all over me? Okay hate me then....
Oh your mom hates me? I would hate me too! I'm skinner, more fit, more toned, more educated, more likeable, I have a career, a 401k, Savings, a vehicle, own my own home, younger then your mom. Your Dad 150% million times upgraded when he got with me. Of course she hates me
I guess im a little more
I guess im a little more straight forward with my SD(5). She once told me that her mom didn't like me, I said "well, That's fine, I don't really like her either. But just because we don't like each other doesn't mean we don't all love you. So don't let her opinion of us, impact what your opinion of us is. You know who we truly are and how much we love you."
I'm gathering this shit never
I'm gathering this shit never stops. It's been every weekend for the past month. It's really aggervating. I try to talk to SO and ask him how he would feel if he was in my shoes. Of course, he doesn't get it. What I would like to say is, "Well, when your wonderful mommy calls me a cunt and your brother a bastard, I'm going to be the bitch from hell."
And that's another thing, I'm mean and I "hate" SD because I don't let her eat in her room, jump on the couch, back talk to you or me, and put her in time out when she doesn't listen. Yup I'm such an awful person that I don't want YOUR precious little girl to turn out to be a hateful, little bitch when she gets older. My fault for caring. Good Luck Disney dad cause I'm not going to be there anymore when your Precious baby is being a brat.
Example, I went downstairs and he looked frustrated. I asked what's wrong. He said she just won't listen to me. Really?? BE THE PARENT, put her in time out if she's not listening. If she keeps doing things she's not supposed to be doing, put her in time out.
I'm am just really at my wits end. I Hate being there on the weekends.