STBXH devil in disguise assaulted me
I'm not sure if I can call this assault. He came to the place that I am staying at and waited outside for me when no one was home. He tried to talk to me and I ignored him and fumbled for my keys to get inside of the guest house. He yanked my arm and took my keys from me and threw them far into the field. He had a tight grip and would not let go. He kept trying to pull me towards him saying he just wants to talk and I kept saying "no leave me alone let go". He had me by both arms at this point tried to pull me in for a kiss I started screaming as loud as I could and he let go so quickly I fell to the floor. He called me some obscene names and left. I had him arrested and I pressed charges for assault.
Would this be considered assault? He didn't hit or punch me. I hope the charges stick. He is like the devil in disguise. I love him and I have loved him with every ounce of me and gave so much to make him happy. I feel like he was the devil in disguise. When I look at him now his eyes crazed and filled with anger it hurts. This is going to sound very stupid. But I feel responsible like maybe if I didn't spring the promotion on him so soon, if I didn't bring up the topic of having another baby, Or if I pressed harder for counseling. I know he wasn't who I thought he was. But how can someone do such a 360? Loving husband, protector, best friend to a scary, cheating monster in the blink of an eye. My mom thinks maybe he is having a mental breakdown and I should be there for him instead of leaving him. My heart tells me I love him but logic tells me to walk away and keep living for baby and me. If I was thinking for myself I would probably make the wrong choice for baby I can't afford to risk anything.
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Yes! This is cause to file a
Yes! This is cause to file a report with the police and get a restraining order!!! Please go to the police today!
If the cops arrested him they
If the cops arrested him they had probable cause that he committed a crime. If all he got charged with was assault he is lucky.
first there is theft: Your keys
theft
: the act or crime of stealing
1
a: the act of stealing; specifically: the felonious taking and removing of personal property with intent to deprive the rightful owner of it
Then there is assult:
as·sault
law : the crime of trying or threatening to hurt someone physically
: a violent physical attack
1
a: a violent physical or verbal attack
2
a: a threat or attempt to inflict offensive physical contact or bodily harm on a person (as by lifting a fist in a threatening manner) that puts the person in immediate danger of or in apprehension of such harm or contact — compare battery 1b
Then you have battery
1
a: the act of battering or beating
b: an offensive touching or use of force on a person without the person's consent — compare assault
Then you have attempted sexual assault
Definition of SEXUAL ASSAULT
: illegal sexual contact that usually involves force upon a person without consent or is inflicted upon a person who is incapable of giving consent (as because of age or physical or mental incapacity) or who places the assailant (as a doctor) in a position of trust or authority
"My mom thinks maybe he is
"My mom thinks maybe he is having a mental breakdown and I should be there for him instead of leaving him."-This made me cringe.
This man is abusive and is controlling. Call the police and get a restraining order. The most important thing is you and your son's saftey.
Yeah, I think her 'mom' is
Yeah, I think her 'mom' is missing a few key 'mom genes'
It made me tear up a little
It made me tear up a little knowing that a "mom" would suggest this. If this was my DD that man would be missing certain key man parts by now.
I'm going to do everything I
I'm going to do everything I have to, to make the charges stick. I don't know where my mind is at right now. I know the right thing to do.
We are all here for you.
We are all here for you.
You are always in my thoughts and I am so sorry that you are going through this. One day you will look back at this and be so proud of yourself and how strong you were for your son.
Thank you so much happy cow.
Thank you so much happy cow.
None of this is your fault.
None of this is your fault. None of it. There is no excuse for doing the things that this man did to you. The truth? He was a master manipulator. Please don't let your Mom give you this shit about him being a victim. That's bull. you are the victim. He manipulated you by being loving and charming when really he was a self serving asshole. This is his fault. Not yours. No woman deserves this treatment no matter WHAT they do. You should seek someone to talk to, a professional, to help you get through this and learn the patterns so you know next time the red flags to see and how to cope with what you've been through.
Re-read this response as
Re-read this response as often as you need to. Especially the first sentence - NONE OF THIS IS YOUR FAULT.
Please don't think that if you acted different, he would have. He may have for a while but tigers don't change their stripes. He was a loser when you met him, he just put on a good show for you and got you to believe that he was different.
Yes, think about how ugly
Yes, think about how ugly this could have been if your baby was in your arms last night. Let that thlight steel your resolve if ever your begins to waver about getting this ”man” out of your life forever
This is another thing to
This is another thing to think about. You don't know what he will do to your baby to punish you. Keep both of you safe!
He's evil. Please stay safe.
He's evil. Please stay safe. I am praying for you.
After work I'm going to take
After work I'm going to take pictures and and file for a RO. I have to what is best even if its hard.
I don't want to frighten you
I don't want to frighten you but he's getting to the point where he's violent and losing control. The trying to kiss you act is disturbing to me, as he is misplacing his anger in a bad way. I have experienced this personally with my ex-Asshole and it led to an act to took me a few years of counseling to get past.
You know what I'm saying here.
Get some pepper spray or mace. Take a few practice shots with it.
The next time he grabs you remember Miss Congeniality and S-I-N-G? That is actually a real thing. Solar plexus - Instep - Nose - Groin.
Then use the pepper spray or mace. Run like hell and call the police. Do not let him touch you again.
He took your keys and threw
He took your keys and threw they away to keep you from entering your home and from being safe. He violently grabbed your arms, leaving bruises and attempted to kiss you. When you fought him, he pushed you hard enough for you to fall, and then verbally assaulted you.
His actions are NOT your fault or responsibility. Many abusers blame the person they're abusing, I hit you because you didn't clean the house. I hit you because you don't love me enough. I hit you because you never give me a chance.
Take pictures of your arms. Call the police. File assault, menacing and theft charges (keys). Get a RO right away. He has threatened you and your family members. Once you have the RO, use it if he breaks it. Don't give him any chances, don't think twice.
Do you have any friends or family in law enforcement? If yes, then see how they can help you.
Thinking about you Newbie. Take care of you and your child.
The more he realizes he is
The more he realizes he is losing control over you, the more violent he may become, so be aware of that.
Stay stuff and (((HUGS))).
THIS! Did the police take
THIS!
Did the police take pictures of your arms? When DH got violent with me, and he didn't touch me, they took pictures of me and offered to do a TRO on the spot.
Like the others said, absolutely take pictures of your arms if you didn't already, and please get that restraining order ASAP! If you are nervous about doing it alone, go to your local women's shelter and they will go with you.
One more thing to add too-
One more thing to add too- keep taking pictures daily as the bruises change colors sometimes the handprint may become more evident please keep us all posted- u've got a lot of love and support worrying about you and your baby' safety...