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Skid Holiday anxiety

TrueNorth77's picture

The holiday anxiety surrounding skids is starting to set in. Demon15 came last night and although honestly she has been less demonic than usual and actually pretty normal, I still dread our custody weeks. I have zero interest in these kids being here.  

Now, SS18 is coming home from college this week. I think today? Or maybe he got here yesterday? I honestly have no idea and I haven't asked DH because I don't bring SS up anymore. I have disengaged and am enjoying the peace of this kid being almost 2,000 miles away from us, even if it doesn't last and he ends up going to college here to be near his high school gf. I am assuming he is staying with Crazy to start- And that's only because DH and SS got into an argument and SS has more freedom with his underage gf there. I have no idea if he is staying with us at all, if/when he is coming by us for Christmas, or what the plan is. I don't want to ask because it's blissful when we don't talk about SS. DH said SS is coming to Christmas at DH's parent's house this Sat, and that's all I know. Allegedly SS is going to his gf's house for Christmas Eve. I would be fine if I escaped his month-long visit home with him staying by Crazy the entire time and only a few short visits to our house, but I'm following DH's lead. 

I'm not a fan of not knowing the plan, but I almost think I hate the knowing more (if it involves SS staying with us). I know we will hear more about SS's plans, probably involving him wanting to move back to our state. Which, also fills me with dread. DH and I had been talking about moving to a different state after Demon is out of HS, and I can see him being more hesitant to do that if his precious SS is living in our state. I am not staying here for SS, DH better not even try to suggest it. Him living here also means summers here and possible wknds home, unscheduled drop-ins. 

I am so tired of these skids. I get absolutely zero joy from them. It's sad when I've only seen SS for 30 minutes since August and not even a small part of me wants to see him now. All I can think of are the snotty texts I've seen him send DH, the disrespect he showed me prior to leaving for college, his entitlement, and how he sent Crazy screenshots of texts DH sent him without all of the context, just to make DH look bad. OVER THESE SKIDS.  

Comments

Trudie's picture

As I read this, I feel so bad for you. Because, even though my situation is different, I understand your feelings of dread. Please take the time to be kind to yourself and do something special just for YOU! I care.

TrueNorth77's picture

This was such a kind comment. I wish I didn't feel the dread. I envy those that thrive as a SM. 

AlmostGone834's picture

Yes to the moving out of state if you can swing it. Honestly it IS so peaceful not having them around. My greatest fear is LI will move back here to our state. Knowing my luck, that will probably happen one day too. Like you, I'm not interested in seeing her at all (no matter how much she is gone). Everywhere she goes she leaves a trail of poor choices and lies. I pity anyone who crosses her path. She'll leave you with a lighter wallet and disgust/bitterness in your heart. 
 

Sounds like SS will stay with mommy most of the season - GOOD! I hope he doesn't darken your doorstep. Maybe "get" real sick coughing, flu.... just for extra protection. 

TrueNorth77's picture

Yes, a real shame if I were to get sick *cough cough* and SS stayed away! 

I didn't even mention the lies SS tells. I don't believe most of what he says. Much like LI, it's hard to listen to any of it. He's actually not bad to talk to until you know he's lying. 
 

Also, I suggested a trip recently to DH with a stop to check out a state as a possible place to move to. He raised his eyebrows and said he still doesn't know how he feels about that. He says it's because he would need to get a job (true), but he has also said he's very ready to go. Now if you add in SS living here that could very well be the tipping point for him to try and stay. 

 

 

Harry's picture

From all this drma. Make a ''real'' new start.    We we married someone with kids we really didn't understand that SK would not respect you.  That you will have no feelings towards SK.  It goes against everything you were taught.  You had a T.V ,, Movies view of SLife.  Not the real one.

The SK are ageing out Demon15 and SS 18. Just keep thinking to yourself 3 more years. Just three more years. 

TrueNorth77's picture

2-1/2 more years. 2-1/2. If at any point I can't handle it we actually have a vacation home very far from here and DH and I both know that house is mine and I will 100% move there. I am very tempted to just go. F these kids.