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Resolutions

Dogmom1321's picture

Submitted by Dogmom1321 on Wed, 01/03/2024 - 9:17am

Any New Years resolutions (step related or otherwise) anyone would like to share?

Mine: To completely ignore BM.

I've been disengaged from SD13 for a while and had little to zero interaction with BM the last couple of years. She recently "announced" a new pregnancy and I found myself curious/puzzled about BMs situation when SD has brought it up. 

I've decided I won't give her any headspace and done trying to "make sense" of her life plans. Won't continue to go down the rabbit hole of how/if/when it would affect custody schedule with SD13. Because ultimately any changes will fall on DH anyway and not me. So I guess I should stop wondering the "what ifs!". Just as a "precautionary" measure I blocked BM on all socials (she did reach out a couple of years ago) so no communication can be made and to also prevent any "snooping" I may be tempted at (new family pics, etc.)

Feel free to share and maybe I can get more ideas too. Happy New Year!

 

Comments

CLove's picture

Submitted by CLove on Wed, 01/03/2024 - 10:07am

Just A more taking care of myself centric, all around kind of resolution.

Im also going to correct SD17 Powersulk firmly when needed. Done eggshell walking.

Going to the gym 3 times a week.

Dry January. Dry-ish.

Rags's picture

Submitted by Rags on Wed, 01/03/2024 - 10:17pm

Pretty simple. Live my best life together with my incredible bride.  And.... get a job.   Which is actually looking good so far.

Cross my fingers and knock of wood.

M88's picture

Submitted by M88 on Thu, 01/04/2024 - 5:23am

- Worry less about SK's stuff - they have many problems I can't solve and when I try my SO doesn't like it so I want to start not giving a crap when it is not directly affecting me.

- Speak less abut them to my partner - often I find myself speaking about them when in reality I just need to disconnect!

- Try to fight less with my SO about the SKs - choose my battles *stop*

Dogmom1321's picture

Submitted by Dogmom1321 on Thu, 01/04/2024 - 9:55am

Yes to the 2nd one! I realized the majority of the time DH and I would 'argue' was when something about SD13 came up. He always took things personally and got defensive of her. 

When talking our about DS3, he never acts that way. He is more matter of fact with him and has no issues discussing problems we're having. Screentime, diet, tantrums, etc. discussion are objective.  Funny how that works :/ 

M88's picture

Submitted by M88 on Thu, 01/04/2024 - 11:48am

I can't do that comparison as it is just SKs for me but hell yeah. I guess he takes it as if I am saying he is a bad dad which is not the case. Imagine how defensive he gets that in our last argument he said that I habe hatred of his daughter (SD12) because I was saying that she was being rude. 

Anyway, it is difficult to not let things affect you but sometimes it is not worth it. We just need to know when it is and when it is not haha

Rags's picture

Submitted by Rags on Thu, 01/04/2024 - 12:09pm

Recognizing rude as what it is is not hateful.  Your DH is an idiot.  Getting his daddy fee fees all hurt because HIS F'n KID IS RUDE!!!!!  Not recognition of the fact that she is rude. Just hurt daddy fee fees because you called it out.

Nea

Take care of you.

Dogmom1321's picture

Submitted by Dogmom1321 on Thu, 01/04/2024 - 12:33pm

Exactly! I would avoid verbally engaging with SD13 and keep any responses short. When I explained to DH why I was deferring all questions to him, he said I was "ignoring" SD13 and making her "invisible" when in fact I was just attempting to avoid confrontation. *eyeroll*