Cheeky with food
So I recently banned SS17 for a few weeks, for spreading nasty gossip. To be fair, he sent me a text apologising. He missed his half sister, who is an 'ours' baby, 19-months-old.
So he came this weekend. We all picked him up, and went to the mall, to get some lunch for my food-fussy baby. We told SS17 that he could order whatever he wanted from the food court. He said 'no Thankyou' , he 'wanted to save room for Grandads roast dinner that night'. Fine!
So I go to KFC, and order myself a meal box, with tenders, popcorn chicken, chips, mash potato and drink. DH goes to get something from the car. SS hangs around, and says "Save room for dinner tonight". I say "Baby and I will share this. She's fussy and popcorn chicken is something she WILL eat . But you can have a few of my chips".
So my meal box arrives, and we find a table. But much to my shock, SS just helps himself to my box! He rips it open, goes poking around, finds baby's popcorn chicken, opens it up, and starts putting the pieces into his mouth!!!! I'm too shocked to say anything, and eventually just feebly mumble "Oh, that's for baby". (WTF is wrong with me???)
So I retrieve the popcorn chicken, and SS then rifles around my box, takes out all the chips, and the aoli sauce, scoffs all the chips, and then says "Oh can I have that potato?" before wolfing that down as well!!!!
Then that night at Grandads, a bread basket gets put out - one slice per person. Grandma and Grandad ate their slices. But DH and I didn't, as SS scoffs down the rest of all the bread. No-one says anything.
After the roast, grandma puts out cake and a bowl of strawberries for everyone. I take a slice of cake, and I'm eating it, hoping to get some strawberries after. But no! SS scoffs down the entire bowl of strawberries! Again, no-one says anything.
Am I being petty? Or would this piss you off too?
When he commented on your
When he commented on your food choices and to "save room" I would not have responded. He doesn't need an explanation. When he started to reach for my food, I would have said "Excuse me, did you change your mind and want your Dad to go get you something?"
Not petty. Your SS sounds like a know it all.
I didn't mind so much that he
I didn't mind so much that he was commenting on my food choices. It just PISSED me off that he would be so RUDE as to open my box of food without asking. I wish I said something. But I just froze like a deer in headlights.
I would have stabbed him with
I would have stabbed him with a fork.
I wish
I wish
Quit tolerating it and call
Quit tolerating it and call the feral scarfer on his crap. From now on, do not let him serve himself until everyone else has been served and then you serve him his portion. Keep it reasonable. He gets no more until everyone else is done and then he gets more only if he asks if anyone else wants more and gets approval to have another helping.
Lather, rinse, repeat.
Public humiliation is a great tool for correcting toxic crap.
That can work when it's our
That can work when it's our house. But not so straightforward when it's not our house.
I disagree. If he is in your
I disagree. If he is in your presence, enforce the rules of basic table manners. Public humiliation is a great tool for confronting this kind of behavior. Particularly when it is in the presence of people who are not core family members.
"Tim, there are others at the table who have not served their plate, that is not your dish to monopolize. Pass the dish on for other's and if there is any left and no one else wants more, you can ask for seconds."
Keep him under the hairy eyeball any time he is eating in your presence, regardless of where that may be. Make sure he knows that your eyes are on him and if he wolfs down food, takes more than a reasonable portion, does not leave a reasonable portion for anyone who has not had their share, and tell him to leave the table if he goes in for more without asking.
Lather, rinse, repeat.
Well Rags, I like how you
Well Rags, I like how you think
Don't let him!
Don't let him!
YSD had to learn this the hard way. A few years ago we had a dinner party and she took literally half a bowl of one of the dinner items before she passed it - I looked hard at her. She said, "OH, I took too much didn't I?" YES - she put the extra back. DH and one friend tried saying it was ok....I said to everyone, "No it's not ok that not everyone at the table may get something that is for everyone, she can have more if any is left after we've all been served." Jeez people. DH and I had been working with her on this for a while.
She still sometimes tries to over-take things but does usually ask first now so IMMEDIATE correction does work.
Sounds like you've done a
Sounds like you've done a great job at stepping up and taking charge. I'm going to have to grow the strength if I'm going to do the same.