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It’s a Boy!!!

whathaveidone89's picture

Submitted by whathaveidone89 on Tue, 02/04/2020 - 7:10am

FH and I are having a boy!

of course the news had us both in tears with happiness. But then was quickly overshadowed by the presence of SD because he couldn't wait to tell her too. Ugh. Can we have a moment without a child's presence? Then he had to help with her homework. Then she wanted to do arts and crafts. Then he had to help her get ready for bed. By the time he had some time to celebrate with me, I had celebrated with my other friends and family and I was just annoyed he couldn't find the SD something to do for 3 bloody hours to share some couple joy. 
 

Then he received discovery responses from BM who committed blatant perjury and wanted to talk about that. I don't want to talk about your custody battle today FH! I'm having a SON and that's all I care about right now. So I lost my cool a little - I confess. I told him I don't want to discuss his custody anymore because I never wanted full time and I don't want to help him with something that will make me unhappy. I told him SD needs to go see her mom and he needs to stop withholding her because it's selfish and I need a break. Now we're not talking this morning. 
 

But I don't care. I'm having a SON!!!

Comments

whathaveidone89's picture

Submitted by whathaveidone89 on Tue, 02/04/2020 - 7:39am

He is concerned BM will snatch SD so has been deliberately withholding her while he awaits a court order prohibiting BM from doing so. But that order can take months.... which means we have her... ALL. THE. TIME. 

WalkOnBy's picture

Submitted by WalkOnBy on Tue, 02/04/2020 - 9:00am

Hmmm, is your bf not worried that he will look like the snatcher now?   who actually has custody at this moment?  anyone paying child support??

whathaveidone89's picture

Submitted by whathaveidone89 on Tue, 02/04/2020 - 10:22am

Well, technically he is maintaining the status quo. When BM snatches her, BM takes her out of state and enrolls her in a new school. But I think they both look as bad as the other and I too, hope the judge gives them both hell. 
 

Right now, with the current arrangement, BM owes child support. 

WalkOnBy's picture

Submitted by WalkOnBy on Tue, 02/04/2020 - 11:20am

but who has custody right now??  Is BM paying her support?  (I know, I know, but I had to ask - lol)

whathaveidone89's picture

Submitted by whathaveidone89 on Tue, 02/04/2020 - 11:46am

Custody is supposed to be joint. Neither BM nor FH acknowledge that while SD is with them - hence the snatching.  BM is NOT paying CS. 

tog redux's picture

Submitted by tog redux on Tue, 02/04/2020 - 11:50am

I personally could not be married to a man who was actively alienating his child from the other parent. Beware if you get divorced, he'll do the same to you. 

whathaveidone89's picture

Submitted by whathaveidone89 on Tue, 02/04/2020 - 2:24pm

SD has a phone. FH does not stop them from talking over phone. But BM called once. She hasn't called since. 

ndc's picture

Submitted by ndc on Tue, 02/04/2020 - 7:51am

Congratulations on your baby boy.  Hopefully your baby man figures out where his priorities should be and acts accordingly, rather than not speaking to you because you had to call him out.

I remember a little drama when I was pregnant - we were waiting to tell skids until a few weeks after the first trimester, but BM's father found out (he and DH worked at the same place and DH apparently lacks discretion) so we had to worry about BM finding out and telling skids before we did. We ended up telling them before we had wanted to, but at least DH didn't suck the joy out of it for me, as this was long after we'd had our "couple" moments and celebrations.

Siemprematahari's picture

Submitted by Siemprematahari on Tue, 02/04/2020 - 8:11am

Congratulations!!! What a blessing, nothing like a mother & son bond.

Biggrin

I can attest because I have two amazing sons. Wishing you all the love and happiness this bundle of joy will bring to your life.

 

Thumper's picture

Submitted by Thumper on Tue, 02/04/2020 - 11:12am

Congratulations !!!

My dh and I did not  run and tell the kids anything. That was our secret for a long time.

I had boys and girls.

About your boyfriend keeping his child from BM on purpose. Not a smart idea.  Courts will not take kindly to this.

Fact is lets say BM was a crack head and a  drunk, dad would have to still return the kid to her UNTIL court ordered change of custody because of "change in circumstances.'

I don't like parents that do this garbage. Sorry in advance if I do not have the legal facts of your case.

Thoughts with you for a healthy pregnancy AND healthy baby.