My boyfriend of 2 yrs doesn't respect my privacy
So here it goes, I live with my boyfriend his 5 yr old lol boy, my 17 yr old and my 9 yr old daughters. Before I moved in my boyfriend's kid was around 3sh so I understood that it was a safety issue, when he would want his son to take a bath in our jacuzzi tub. Now he's 5 and I'm like he's a bit older he can now take a bath in the kids bathroom, of course with the door open to continue to watch him.
However, seeing how I'm not his mom I dont feel comfortable him seeing me naked. The other day pushed me to my limits with the whole taking a bath in our master bathroom. His son had went up stairs to take a bath after he came back from his moms. But, before he did I figured I'd take a quick shower so that I can hang out with my man while his son took a bath. My bf came upstairs and was pissed because I took a shower in "our bathrom. He said I disrespected him and his son and that he doesn't come 2nd. Yet and still the kids bathroom was available.
Many times before if we're going somewhere, co.ing back or towards the end of the night. My bf gets ready to take a shower and puts him in the tub and makes me wait until the kid gets done with his bath, then I can take a shower. So this last time was the last straw, I feel like I get no privacy in my own bathroom and he has no respect either. I made sure the kids bathroom was just as nice and put together as ours or the rest of the house for that matter.
So what I did was move out of the master bathroom and into the kids. He keeps asking me to move my stuff back in every day for the last 2 weeks or so. But, I don't know how to tell him that that was messed up of him to treat me like that, without having to sound like I'm being the evil stepmother. Cuz if anything I do more for this kid then his own mother.
What do i do?
Next time make sure all of
Next time make sure all of your kids take baths/showers, one by one and slowly in the master bathroom, before he can get in there. Tell him they come first and he just needs to suck it up.
Hell no. I am shocked by this non man and his crap.
Just tell him.
"You have put a child above your mate. So, your mate is no longer your mate until you pull your head out of your ass, grow up, man up and put me and our relationship as your priority. Your child and my children are not the priority. We are the priority. Collectively the kids are our top relationship responsibility but they can never take priority over the relationship.
If you ever again forget this unequivocal and non negotiable fact and think that you can displace me from my bathroom or from my place as your equity life partner in order to coddle your kid I will not only move to another room, I will leave and not look back. Get it? So, your boy bathes in the kid's bathroom from now on. Our bathroom is our bathroom."
Keep it pointed, keep it firm and make it crystal clear.
Welcome to the site!
^^^^ What he said ^^^^^
I don’t think there is any
I don’t think there is any issue with having a kid’s bathroom and an adult’s bathroom. We all share one bathroom and when the kids were really little it was frustrating at points. Bath toys left in the tub, toothpaste / water drops all over the mirror, and of course 4 of everything on the counter. I want a second bathroom just so I have room to leave my hair dryer out and SO’s gauges stop getting knocked into the sink.
Now while that’s said I also understand older children wanting to take a bath in the nicer tub if there’s a big difference HOWEVER the adult comes first in that case and the child needs to clean up after themselves.
The issue is not only does boyfriend want the kid to use the master bathroom but then he’s upset that you’re using the kid’s bathroom… Nope can’t have it both ways. This isn't him putting the kid first. It's him putting you nowhere.
Update...
He talked to his son and let him know that he will now be sharing a BR with the girls (regular nice decor, not girly) he was surprisingly excited and felt a sense of independence. I told him I would buy him a cool towel and he started telling me which characters he liked. My bf understood where i was coming from and i think he learned some sort of lesson. He didn't enjoy having bathroom as if he was single. Lol
Thank you everyone for your feedback. It sure helped understand what I was feeling.