Does your DH attach the same sentiment to objects that you do? While I understand your reasons for being upset - is there a possibility that to him it was just a water bottle? If so, then to him, giving it to his son was no big deal. He may not have thought that he was giving a gift you gave him to his son - he just thought he was giving him a useful item. I know in our household there are more water bottles than we can easily use - while I have a favorite that I am never without, my DH will use whatever one is handy. This might be just a case of you viewing the same item in a different way.

"I expected DH to know better, fact that he gave away the bottle to his son whom he doesnt share with me but with another woman simply means he didnt value or respect my gift to him and he has no regards for my feelings. "

WOW

If I were your husband, I'd give you back the money for the water bottle and never accept another "gift" from you.

It was a gift.  When you give someone a gift , you don't get to decide what they do with it.

I think you're being a bit over the top about this. You gave the water bottle to your husband; it's his to do what he wants with. Most people don't attach great sentimental value to a water bottle, even if it was expensive. Asking him to send you back the money you spent on the water bottle is rude and ridiculous.

You bought a water bottle with ideas and hopes about its use?

I can understand being upset that you bought something pricey and it being "ruined" by a SK. That is annoying. But you're taking this like it's a super deep betrayal, like your DH cheated on you.

If you had all these plans for a water bottle that was full of ideas and hopes, you should have kept it and only brought it out during those times. Or told DH how you felt and what you wanted to do with it.

Sorry, I'm just having a really hard time with this one. There is either more background where DH gives away EVERYTHING you have bought him to SS (which is a different problem) or where you two have fundamental differences in opinion, which can be a big problem.

If I want to keep anything nice or special, i bring it in my room, hide it or leave it at my mom's house. Nothing brought in to this skid house is sacred. 

I don't think this is really about the water bottle is it, you said he always kept his at work and if the problem was that you had bought it with ideas of the two of you using  them together doing fun things then him leaving it at work would have been an issue aswell.

I can remember coming across my ex's pile of "precious keepsakes" and there were birthday/Xmas cards going back years from his daughter and a couple from his nan but he hadn't kept any of mine I'd given him, that hurt because I'd kept all of his. I'd kept our boarding passes from holidays and lots more but there was nothing of me in his keepsakes. I wonder if your problem is more along these lines? Maybe you feel you care about the relationship and special things more than he does? I totally get that. 

But asking for the money back on the water bottle does come across as a bit petty. I don't think many kids would treasure and look after a water bottle and ultimately it's not ss',s fault if your dh was a bit unthinking of your feelings. I think you're troubles run deeper though, I don't believe this is over a water bottle, I think the water bottle is just another thing in a long list of things...

I would be hurt about this as well. My love language is receiving gifts, but I also show love by giving gifts, and I put a lot of thought into things. If I gave a gift to someone, no matter what it was, and they gave it away, I would be a bit upset.

That being said, I do think the hopes and ideas of a water bottle and asking for your money back may be taking things a bit too far. After all, he didn't ask you to buy this for him. This probably just comes down to you both attaching different meaning to this- to you, this gift meant something. To him, you just bought a water bottle, which is just a household item. Recently my SO and I have been disagreeing regularly about skids. It has been exhausting and wearing on us, and we need to figure out how to resolve it. I realize a lot of it is me criticizing his Disney Dad parenting and even just criticizing small things in general, so I'm working on biting my tongue. I also have been trying to do nice gestures, like buying small gifts to let him know I'm trying and to let him know I'm thinking of him. I explained that to him, and he said that doesn't mean much to him. He said it's nice, but he doesn't notice the gifts as much as he does actions. It was kind of an aha moment for me, and I didn't like it because how can you not appreciate the things I'm buying you??? It's because our love languages are different- we are literally speaking different languages. I think you may be in a similar boat. You may have to realize that he didn't see this as a real gift (did you actually wrap it and present it as a gift, or just kind of hand it to him like, here you go?), and isn't attaching as much meaning to the situation as you are. It's soo hard to do, trust me, I would have a hard time as well. Either way, take a step back- I do think you are overreacting a bit. Calmly explain to him that you put thought into it and it hurt your feelings that he gave it away and it wasn't taken care of. In the future, if you give him a gift, it's for him, and no one else. And if you haven't already, take the love language quiz! Both of you. It really does help you understand how the other works.  

Did your DH realize your intention, that it was an actual gift? Not just, "I happened to pick this up for you," type of thing? Because it seems rude and inconsiderate that he would give it to his son if he knew you specifically bought it as a gift, to use when the two of you went running, or whatever.

Are you sure he gave it so SS and SS didn't just see it sitting around and start using it?

Have you talked to your husband about this or have you just created this betrayal in your mind, without really knowing how SS ended up with the water bottle?

I can see both sides of this. You gave DH what you felt was a thoughtful gift for the two of you to utilize while making memories together.

On the other hand it's water bottle, which is usually a common household item and for most doesn't hold much sentiment. Unless his name was engraved on it with some sort of special love comment, I can understand why DH probably didn't give it much thought.

I think you need to talk to your DH, not in anger, but tell him why these water bottles meant so much to you and why it hurts you to see him give them to SS as if they are just a casual gift that can be passed on.

He actually gave it to his son permanently or hes just borrowing it? Actually regifting it is tacky and rude. Usually when you regift you dont want the person that originally gave the gift to know you gave it to someone else. Theres obviously no way you could avoid that happening here.

Sometimes we have to be vulnerable and admit our own insecurities. Taking a little time to think about things from a different persepctive can help us to have a productive conversation rather than reacting with our initial hurt.

To your husband you gave him a nice water bottle, it holds water, he can carry it around, hopefully he used it for a while and found it useful. One day his son needed a water bottle, and his was nearby so he gave the bottle to his son to use. Problem solved.

He does not attach the same sentimental feelings and hopes for the future and memories of the past to the water bottle that you do. He does not understand the significance that the bottle holds for you. By asking for the money back, you still have not had that conversation and could either antagonise your husband that you do not like his son and would deny him some water or just confuse him and look petty.

If I was you I would sit down with him and tell him that you accept that this is just a water bottle that is as useful as any other water bottle but that you had feelings and emotions attached to it and had thought carefully about giving it and what adventures you two would have together with your water bottles. Tell him you know that it still works as a water bottle and still holds water, but that because you had such intention and dreams behind giving it that you felt rejected when he gave it to his son and allowed his son to get it all scratched up. Tell him that you know that what you are saying sounds irrational and petty and jelous but that you cannot help the way you feel and that it would mean a lot to you if he could take this water bottle back (give his son another one) and treasure it as you two enjoy your future together. 

Being a step parent is a conflicting place to be and sometimes these weird insecure feelings and emotions erupt in us and we end up jealous or resentful of children other seemingly minor things. Acknowledging these, discussing them and finding ways to live with them or move around them is the healthy way forwards. 

"It's just that when i bought that bottle i was so happy to buy it for DH it came from the heart with so many ideas and hopes."

I don't mean to be unkind, but read this sentence you wrote to yourself and see how overly dramatic  it sounds. With all due respect, I just don't think most people have "ideas and hopes" about a water bottle, of all things, even a really nice one. Unless you shared those "ideas and hopes" with your DH, I bet he didn't give it a second thought if he is the one who gave it to SS. And asking your DH to pay you for the cost of the water bottle is just plain petty.

In addition,referring to your SS as your DH's "chid with another woman" sounds like you have major resentment and insecurity issues with his existence. Ask yourself if it would have bothered you like that if he gave the bottle to your toddler (in, say, a year or so, when sippy cups will be all the rage in your world, if they're not already!) I definitely agree you need to dig a little deeper, but I think it's within.

if i got a wedding anniversary or birthday gift for hubby like an engraved watch with our names, i’d expect it’s sentimental and for hubby only, not to gift to ss or borrow and why would you wanna borrow something that personal with engraving from your stepparent for your bio parent.

but expensive water bottle...  is it personalised with a name and how expensive are we saying?? $20-50?? If its not personalised with a name i get why he would gift it to his kid if he needed one for school and hubby didn’t see it as a big deal. In his head he might see it as well at least my kid will make use of it.

generally i only buy sentimental things for wedding anniversary or birthdays like jewellery or weekend getaways etc. My husband will buy me a bracelet, I wouldn’t share it with anyone and he certainly wouldn’t let a skid borrow because its mine to pass down my family line as a heirloom