Had a good session with the therapist recently and went over some of the recent happenings (recent stuff in my posts and a few other little things).

When I told her how DH wasn't able to get me agitated with one thing that he fully switched tactics and topics to try to win/get me mad it was gratifying seeing her have a reaction that what he did and said was weird. I made a comment that he seems to like to create drama and some sort of fight in order to transfer his bad feelings onto me. She asked if I had more examples and I gave her some. She said it certainly seems to be what he's doing.

And I said that I think DH is trying to make me be his mother--and I don't want to be. I discussed some instances of his expecting me to be the mother/caretaker/person-to-cover-his-butt and how it took me doing something big, not just talking to him, but have actual situations occur where he couldn't expect me to bail him out or "handle" whatever it was to see any shift in his attitude. She said it sounds like I need to train him. My thought and what I said out loud was: "I have to train a grown man how to be a grown man? That doesn't seem right."

It's been on my mind now. This is not what I expected or signed up for and I'm not liking it. I think of the big "learning opportunities" I have ended up doing just to get DH to stop expecting me to bat clean-up. It's infuriating and exhausting to think that I have to do even more of it. It's not my job or responsibility to turn him into a grown man, it's his. (XH and I divorced because he got a TBI and his personality/attitude toward me changed 180 and it didn't get better over time. But I didn't ever have to think about "training" him in any way.) I'm considering suggesting to DH that he go to therapy. Or, maybe, as I joked with the therapist, some sort of husband obedience class.

I don't really need any advice. I'm just posting this to get the thoughts out of my head and have it somewhere to step back, to look at, and consider.