Do your stepkids hit your SO???
I know times have changed BUT dear god this situation with SO and his kids is so F@ck up. SO and BM have been fighting in and out of family court basically since they divorced 7 yrs ago. They fight over everything from money to custody. BM will drag his ass to court over the dumbest stuff. Why the judge allowed this bullshit to continue for over 7 years without telling BM to stop wasting tax dollars is Beyond me. Regardless because of this SO is paranoid to Discipline his kids in fear they will run back to mommy and Exaggerate the situation. They will too. BM got a restraining order on SO in the past due to lies these little monsters told. Of course it was unfounded but still. Both step kids are boys 11 and 14. The older one has a GF so basically we don’t see much thank god BUT the younger one is s Loose cannon. It’s a struggle to get him to do just the basic stuff like brush his teeth, shower or do his homework. Forget chores or helping around the house. If you push him to hard he will swear, throw things and throw a complete temper tantrum. Again this is just basic things kids his age should do on his own. Half the time SO is Unsuccessful is getting younger SS to do these things. Normally a child of his age would be punished for such behavior BUT not SS. I have MAYBE seen SO punish younger SS twice in the 6 yrs I’ve been with in and it all was when SS was younger. SS has not been punished in the last 4 yrs. The Latest incident was today. SS wanted SO to play football in the backyard. SO said he would after dinner. Well SO had a really bad migraine after dinner and told SO he was not feeling well and SS would have to wait. Well SS flipped a nut. Started crying, threw SO cell phone and when SO sternly told SS to stop SS slapped SO across the face hard and ran up to his room. SO DID NOTHING. Eventually SS came down from his room and was “cold” to SO for about an hour then it was like it never happened. SO never made him apologize for throwing his phone or slapping him. This is typical of SS behavior if things don’t go his way. Is this crazy or what???!!
No. That's not normal or
No. That's not normal or acceptable. It's actually a crime to hit someone and your SO is doing him NO favors in life allowing him to get away with it. Stay safe. Does he ever act aggressively towards you?
Both Kids have been
Extremely rude and Disrespectful to me but nothing Beyond that. The reason is I let SO handle EVeRYTHING REGARDING THE KIDS. If SS wants to jump on the couch or eat candy for dinner go for it. I Guarantee if I started trying to get SS to do things he does not want I would get the same treatment as SO so I just keep my mouth shut. I have my own place and plan on keeping it that way till these little Psychos turn 18 or end up in jail.
My formerSS13 was a freaking
My formerSS13 was a freaking feral jerk too. I couldn't deal with his behavior OR my formerSO allowing such wretched behavior. He lived with formerSO full-time (and also me) and rarely went to his mom's to visit. That crap was about to drive me insane; I had NEVER seen a child behave like that before.
Seriously, do you have a difficult time respecting your SO? I did and it got to the point I was just completely diagusted.
If my SO tolerated that kind
If my SO tolerated that kind of behavior I would have a hard time respecting him as well. Such a turn-off. This would neverrrr fly at our house.
If my SO tolerated that kind
If my SO tolerated that kind of behavior I would have a hard time respecting him as well. Such a turn-off. This would neverrrr fly at our house.
Welcome to the site! I was
Welcome to the site! I was so delighted when I read that you have your own place - NEVER give it up, is my advice.
I have to agree with other posters that I would have a hard time retaining any respect for an SO who allowed his kid to behave like this.
Thank you for everyone who answered!
I’m so happy I found a place to vent. Yes I will NEVER give up my place. Yes I lose respect when I see these monsters treat my SO this way. Worse is the way he allows BM to walk all over him. I have asked him a hundred times why he allow BM to call all the shots and his response is the same “he wants to avoid drama of fighting and just have a Peaceful life”. How is this a Peaceful life?? Also he avoids fighting with BM over something but then WE fight over why he gave in to her???? So basically he would rather fight with me than BM??? A big WTF in my mind. SO is a great guy IF you took the step monsters out and the BM. I don’t get why men are so paranoid over their Ex’s. I can’t Imagine how these brats are going to be when they get to be 16 or 17 years old especially the younger one. How will they Function as an adult scary as hell. I’m hoping to get to an age where things will turn around and they start being normal.
Why would they?
Why would they? They have been taught that they can literally hit in the face the adult who is in charge with no consequences. They will continue down this path until they hit the wrong person and get the crap kicked out of them and are seriously injured or are arrested.
Be very careful. Tables can
Be very careful. Tables can turn very quickly. Dad or you could be charged with assult or abuse.
May be time for dh to put his foot down and holt future time the child comes into your home. Would you invite your neighbor to walk in the doors IF you neighbor assulted you last week?
Use common sense. For some reason parents do not use their common sense when they are divorced.
OR check your bank account and make sure there is enough to cover dh's bail and attornies fees and 6months of work pay. Dad could loose his job over this SH**
That would be the end
It is hard enough to be with a man who has zero balls when it comes to the BM or their kids...but allowing physical violence would be the end of the road for me. Any person who would allow a child to strike them and have zero consequences is not someone I could respect enough to want to spend my life with them.
Its hard enough with the emotional abuse these men tolerate. But physical??? Not a shot in hell.
i was in the verge of ending my marriage over DH allowing BM and the SSs to run his life....had one of them struck him and he tolerated it I would have been out.
That kid needs his fanny straightened out.
We DID call the cops 6 months ago on older SS
Older SS who is 14 Stole some family heirlooms. When SO confronted SS14 about he got Verbally abusive and refuse to tell us where he stash the stuff. SO called the cops. We were not going to press charges BUT wanted to scare the little asshole into telling us where he hid the stuff. Well SS ran out of the house before the cops could get there and called “mommy” from down the street to come save him which of course the old hag did. Long story short SO got his ass handed to him in family court by the piece of crap judge. The Judge was mortified that SO Would even think about calling the cops on poor innocent SS. Yes you heard me right. So we never found out what SS did with the family heirlooms and no Punishment was given to SS for stealing or the way he behaved as “it’s SS’s word Against ours”. This is what the judge said. So as you see “calling the cops” does not work well for us
Not if they wanted to live.
Not if they wanted to live. I can't even immagine the consequences if I had slapped my father. Just the thought makes me shudder.
I would whuup that kids bare butt with a belt, have him living in an empty room with bare floors and he would rue the day he pulled that crap in my world.
smh