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Finally Done This Time?

futurestepmom95670's picture

Submitted by futurestepmom95670 on Fri, 09/28/2018 - 6:30pm

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I think I'm finally done this time. I moved my stuff out and got my own place two months ago (I had moved in despite my better judgement). I gave him chance after chance to put me first, change his drinking habits, and be a better man. People don't change, but I'm moving on. One phrase that has resonated with me through all of this is that was posted on this site was "he has shown you the man he is going to be." He may make short-term changes, but he will always let his controlling mother dictate his life, his rude obnoxious daughter disrespect me and our relationship, and he will not stop drinking. I'm better than this, I deserve to be happy, and I'm going to avoid dating another man with kids like the plague. 

 

I think this will be a good thing. I'm not the first, and I'm not the last to leave. I do appreciate all of the support on this site, though. 

Mrs.Marvel's picture

Submitted by Mrs.Marvel on Fri, 09/28/2018 - 6:34pm

Your left a toxic relationship; now go and enjoy your freedom, and remember,  don't look back!! 

Notup4it's picture

Submitted by Notup4it on Fri, 09/28/2018 - 8:02pm

That is right... when someone shows you their nature believe it, either you accept it (and that’s on you) or you leave for better.

Dodged a bullet, as they say. Take care of you. Xo 

 

hereiam's picture

Submitted by hereiam on Sat, 09/29/2018 - 8:58am

Good for you for putting yourself first.

Although a man without kids would be ideal, remember that it's not the fact that a man has kids, it's the man himself, how he parents those kids and how he treats his mate. With or without kids, your man sounds like a dud.  

Exjuliemccoy's picture

Submitted by Exjuliemccoy on Sat, 09/29/2018 - 11:57am

I am so, so glad for you!

And now that you've extricated yourself, I'll share that it's been difficult not to comment too much on your posts. Years ago I was much like you, living in 95670 and dating a mama's boy from a dysfunctional family. Through friends, I know that his life has been a sh!tshow of failed relationships and parenting fails. I'm so glad to have dodged that bullet.

Take it slow, invest in yourself, and be very, very choosy about the men you allow in your life. There ARE good ones out there, but you need to be picky.

And keep adding to the conversation here. You have valuable insight to share.

Exjuliemccoy's picture

Submitted by Exjuliemccoy on Mon, 10/15/2018 - 7:38pm

Not unless your ex is about thirty years older than you, lol.

I wish you well with your surgery. And FWIW, there ARE good guys out there. Some of them even have kids. The key is to never, ever settle for anyone who doesnt cherish you. I mean seriously adore you.

Rainydaze777's picture

Submitted by Rainydaze777 on Sat, 09/29/2018 - 10:48pm

It was hard to leave mine too- the first month was awful- I'm doing really well now, really busy with work, art, trading, school amd I have a bunch of guys blowing up my phone wanting to take me out and actually treat me well. 

Who knew lol

my ex fiancé is blowing up my phone calling and calling- I think he can sense the energy shift that I don't care anymore and I'm moving on.

he was a dick to me, my heart was broken, I picked myself up and I feel stronger than I ever have.

Best wishes to you xoxo

Rags's picture

Submitted by Rags on Fri, 10/12/2018 - 11:16am

"Finally done this time?" ... Why the question mark?

Make it "I am done!"  Then dive in full speed ahead on your new life adventure.

Take care of you.