At my breaking point!!!
I am at appoint where I can no longer deal with the evil Step-mom/daughter-in-law rap!! I grew up a stepchild who wasn’t treated well my my stepparent! So when I met my husband I knew I would treat his son as my own!! The way I wanted to be treated when I was a kid!! His mom is his mom she can never be replaced but that doesn’t mean We can’t be a family! His mother on the other hand can’t have that!! She says I poke my nose into things that are non of my business and pretty much tells my SS my family isn’t his family!! Which I am sorry but if the decision BM and BD are making affect my children, home or financial situation they are my business and my family isn’t my SS family yet her ex husband ‘s family and her boyfriends family are his family?? My step son is 16 my husband and I have been together since he was a baby!! My mother-in-law acts like she is her daughter-in-law! ( something she never was since my husband and her were never married! ) and SS mom loves to shove that in my face all the time!! Yes I know my mother-in- law can be friends with whom ever she wants but yes it hurts to have her want to be close to someone who treats her son like an atm and me like crap!! My husband doesn’t want to deal with his ex’s drama so just let’s her crap go in one ear and out the other!! He would never talk to his mom about her friendship with his ex!! Which leaves me on my own to deal with the crap!! And after 15 years together last night at my SS football game!! While my mother-in-law talked with my SS mom!! I realize no matter how hard I work at it or what I do nothing will ever change!! I will always be the outsider and I just don’t think I can do it anymore!! I wish people would realize that not all stepparents are evil!! There are good and bad one just like there are good and bad parents!! Don’t throw away a family over a stereotype!!
You have to one disengage
and two realize that if BM and BF were so into there Bio kid they would still be together for the kid. Until at least he 18yo There people put themselves first. By splitting up they cause all types of problems. They could not fix themselves, so how are you going to fix them. You focus on yourself, having fun with your family, with SS. Doing thing with DH. Without SS. They told you where your place is, so accepted it
Why don't you just remove
Why don't you just remove your MIL from your life 100%. Let her be someone you used to know. I promise you your life will improve greatly.
Time for a come to Jesus
Time for a come to Jesus discussion with your DH about both his former breeding partner and his toxic smother.
I would suggest that you write both of those hag harpies off and purge them from your life. Two more years and if the SKid doesn’t align with standards of reasonableness then you can write him off too.