Unless this is a regular occurance and you are always left out, let it go.

Sometimes kids just want to be with their parent and not the step. My youngest son is like this. He just wants to go to a movie with his Dad and not always have his stepmom with them. He loves his stepmom and she loves him but sometimes he just wants time alone with his Dad.

My skids are the same. I don't always join them for lunch or dinner or walks or golf. I let them had time alone with their Dad.

Hell, most of the time I want my DH to myself. I don't want to share him with his parents or his kids. I think we deserve time alone, so do the skids.

I have the same situation, ie DH does things with his daughters and most of the time I don't go along - this is mostly because I don't want to as I don't like them.  However, it is not a nice feeling to be excluded intentionally.  DH always invites me along - just most of the time I say, thanks, but no thanks.  

If I got the feeling that SD was purposely picking activities I was unable to join in with, and purposely excluding me, then I would have a problem with that.  The invitation should be open to you most of the time, whether or not you accept.  It is a different matter with young kids that can benefit from some Daddy time.  After they're adults then this doesn't apply, IMO.  

i don't think it will hurt for them to have an outing alone together - as long as the other SO wasn't invited and you were the only one excluded.  just as long as it wasn't a consistent thing.  This is what even adult kids do - they want time alone.  I've seen it adn lived it on both sides.

I am presuming you instinctively know how your SD feels about you, and this is not the first time you have been excluded. Chances are this is a repeated pattern in some form. So yea, the outdoor concert, which would be to difficult for you, is just another occassion to add to a long list of exclusion. I GET THIS. Unless you have lived this people just dont understand. 

Hope it doesnt rain at the outdoor concert

Your question why didnt she pick something that would work for both  you and DH? Well we both know the answer to that. 

Why couldnt sd choose and outing that would have worked for both dh and me?  she knows i cant walk well.

Either she sincerely didn't think of this as being an issue because it was about her spending time with her father or she did it to spite you and doesnt want you to go. Either way don't let this keep you down. Plan something fun for yourself that day and wish H a great time.

Enjoy the day to youself!

If you are excluded, it is because your DH allows it. So, let them exclude you; then- you exclude her from your home etc., exclusionary decisions work two ways and if he cannot get the message out about this unacceptable behavior and treatment designed to demean your position as his wife, then time for you to set your own boundaries....It is hurtful --if you feel excluded, period.  That is how you measure it; it is that simple.

Suddenly, you decide all time can become exclusion time-- with regards to you -in the future, you have better things to do.  Both of these people have issues, especially your husband. But, you are definitely not alone here.  Funny thing, when you want to stay away after being excluded, they want you to be included again......just say no when it happens, it will.....

I don’t think there is enough information here to know the full story.  But, like Dovina I would be apt to presume the OP instinctively knows how her SD feels about her, and that this is not the first time the OP has been or felt excluded.  But, this is something only another SM would be willing to do or catch on to.

Being a SM can be death by a thousand paper cuts.   It is so easy when you are in the ivory towers or have never been in another SM’s shoes to say, “What’s the big deal,” “Who cares,” “You’re making a mountain out of a mole-hill,” “You’re unjustified in what you’re thinking,” “You’re overreacting,” “You’re just jealous,” and so on.  But, for so many SMs, the devil is in the details or in the paper cuts.  Over time, those micro or mini-slaps or criticisms start to add up.

The OP probably put up with and had no problem putting up with daddy-daughter dates for years; she may have even encouraged them.  Then, all of a sudden, she notices that even with everyone being adults, none of the fun dates ever seem to include her; or that certain other family members’ SOs are attending these so-called father-daughter only events; or that these events always seem to take place in non-handicapped accessible locations.  Not saying this is specifically the case here, but it could be.  Many a SM knows how micro-jabs at alienation can roll. 

It is so easy for those on the outside to just brush off what they see as a bunch of small nothings or problems.  Paper cuts, however, are deceiving.  They’re not big.  They seem non-threatening, and by themselves, they might be.  On the other hand, what may look like a bunch of small problems, when combined, can severely hamper relationships, and in particular relationships amongst steps.  None of these problems are seismic in proportion, or appear to be. But combined with each other, they can be lethal.

That is why, once you see these little paper cuts consistently popping up, you need to act. I’d go so far as to say that DH, as a dad and as a husband (yes!, as the middle man), is responsible not just for averting massive meltdowns but also for trying to eliminate the paper cuts that will eventually kill any chance for the family to connect.  As a SM, some people might think you’re overreacting. Don’t listen to them.  They could easily be one of the paper cuts.