So you know those chalk silhouette drawings that you can get made while at carnivals or fairs?

Well, back in 2009 I took my son to Cedar Point for a really great vacation. I even rented a room for the night so that we could ride the rides all day and I wouldn't have to be worried about being too tired for the drive home. It was a GREAT vacation with my son. He was 13 at the time and I knew that it would be the last time he and I could really enjoy a vacation like that together. You know, before he got "too" teenager-y. And it was everything that I hoped it would be. That vacation was the last time my son held my hand in public and wasn't ashamed to be seen having a good time with me. Shoot, he even smiled! Haha. I saved up for several months (being a single mom and all) in order to be able to afford that vacation. It was a (practically) no expense spared. I went all out. We got to eat out (and not have to take PB&J sandwiches with us) and we got to drink the $5 cans of soda. I didn't complain. I didn't even wince. Spending that time with my kid was worth it.

Back on that vacation I got one of those drawings of my son and I. It's not a really great rendition of myself, but the artist NAILED my son. It is an excellent drawing. I love looking at it.

Ok, so I was painting the house this week. I had to move the bookshelf that the drawing rests on. (Nothing has been hung on the walls because we've been waiting to paint). So I moved the drawing and set it on top of another table. I honestly did NOT think that SS would stoop this low:

Last night I went to put that drawing back up on the bookshelf now that the paint has dried. As usual, I paused to look at it to reminisce and.... *drum roll please*

I said, "What the heck. [My son]'s face is all scratched up!"

H says sarcastically, "What, and let me guess: you think SS did it." (Not a question, but a statement).

So I just showed him the drawing and we both studied it. The ONLY scratches (like a scribble with a fingernail - back and forth about 6-7 times) on the entire drawing are across [my son]'s face.

I said nothing for about 2 minutes as we both looked at the drawing. It's clear that the scribble was done both intentionally and maliciously.

Finally I very calmly said, "How do YOU think it happened?"

My H was quiet for a very long moment, then he started to cry. Yes, cry.

Then he said, "SS must have done it. He was the only one in the house this weekend that would have done such a thing. The only scratches on the entire drawing are on [your son]'s face. There is no denying this was done intentionally. It's clear that it wasn't an accident."

H had a huge breakdown about it. I stayed calm.

H had a hard time believing that his kid would do something so nasty. He DID believe that his son had done it, he just couldn't wrap his brain around how intentional and malicious it was.

I, however, was not surprised. H has allowed the kid to get away with disrespecting me for a long, long time. I knew his behavior was escalating. I TOLD my H that his behavior was escalating. Rather than HEAR me, my H stuck his head in the sand and choose to take the easy road: destroy his marriage rather than deal with his sons horrible behavior and nastiness.

What I find super ironic is that, just that morning, my H and I talked about a divorce. I told him that I could "see the writing on the wall" and that I KNEW his kid was just getting started.

No need to rehash all of the crap SS has done and where WE know the kid is headed and the kinds of problems it has caused and will continue to cause. WE all get it. My H has chosen to ignore it.

Now, because of his unwillingness to be a parent, I have lost a memoir of one of MY greatest parenting moments.

Oh the irony.

So tonight my H is supposed to call his kid and deal with it. I'm trying to not be too hopeful, but honestly it really does *seem* as though my H may finally be getting it.

My H told me, "If I had something like that drawing with me and my kids, it would be one of my most prized possessions. I understand why it's so important to you. It would be that important to me too. I get it: the thing is irreplaceable. It's priceless. SS can't just go "buy" you a new one. This is bad. This is really, really bad. And if I had a drawing like that and [your son] did something like that to it, I'd be so angry and so hurt because of how disrespectful and horrible of an act it is to defile something so precious."

We'll see how he actually deals with it.