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Day 3 of school and ss14 has his first disciplinary action...

hismineandours's picture

Submitted by hismineandours on Fri, 08/17/2012 - 12:21pm

I still have access to ss's info through the online website so I got on there and checked what he's been up to. Had a disciplinary action this morning for being "very disruptive, disrespectful to others students belongings, wont sit down, wont stop talking"-said the teacher took him out in the hall in which he told her "I didnt have my medicine today". I am so sick of this pitiful excuse. I am pretty stinking sure this kid has not had any medication since June. In fact, my dd14 whose locker is right next to ss14 came home and told me yesterday she didnt think he had his meds because of the way he was acting in the hall. That's when I told her I didnt think he took them at all anymore since we've not received an EOB on him since June (when he lived here).

Strangely, the day they all went to the amusement park this summer he did not have his meds, and yet, he wasnt disruptive. His disruptiveness seems to come and go per his mood, rather than any meds-but this is the excuse he uses everytime he gets in trouble at school. This seems to elicit sympathy from the teachers and they end up cutting him a break.

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Willow2010's picture

Submitted by Willow2010 on Fri, 08/17/2012 - 12:24pm

OMG...sounds just like my SS. He was ALWAYS in trouble. He and DH and BM always fell back on the whole ADHD thing too. It was such a load of crap. The only thing wrong with SS was he was a spoilt brat.

goohsmom's picture

Submitted by goohsmom on Fri, 08/17/2012 - 12:39pm

I have a son with ADHD and seizure disorder. When he wants, he is sharp as a tack, extra helpful, on top of everything. When he doesn't.......well, at that point, his pills will help a bit, but they don't change what he does or does not want to do. We recognize that fact, and try to figure out ways to make him want to develop good habits, even when it's something boring like Social Studies.

That being said, my DS doesn't have carte blanche to misbehave, but we do keep his condition in mind when something comes up, either here or at school. Many things can mess with his brain, and we try to be observant to match up conditions with results. It's been hard for my fiance to handle, since he has your philosophy that it's just a character flaw for DS, but sadly it isn't that simple.

Much luck to you finding a way to control your SS's problems, and helping him excel.
Pam

hismineandours's picture

Submitted by hismineandours on Fri, 08/17/2012 - 1:09pm

SS14 has been on meds since he was 5. He has periods of being off of them. In fact he went 18 months without meds at one point. He has been on a total of 4 different adhd meds-has also been on antidepressants and antipsychotics at different times. What I can say is that the meds only ever helped marginally. He remained disruptive, rude, hateful, and deviant even on meds. But perhaps instead of being that way 100 per cent of the times-with meds he was that way 90 percent of the time. I'm not truly sure that was enough of an improvment to justify being medicated and the associated side effects. The kid is in high school and could very easily pass for a 4th or 5th grader. I certainly cant say for sure that the meds stunted his growth-but I cant imagine they helped either.

This has always been his go-to excuse when he hastn taken them that day, when they wear off in the evening, or if he is off them for any reason. When we point out that he acts the same way even when he has them he simply gets angry.

goohsmom's picture

Submitted by goohsmom on Fri, 08/17/2012 - 2:17pm

I don't get EOB's for meds either.

Frankly, it sounds to me as if SS14 needs to see a new practitioner and have his meds adjusted. ADHD meds are not a magic bullet, and any practitioner worth their diploma will also have a behavior plan in place for SS14. At least, that's my experience, both my DS13 and DS27. Meds make it easier to follow a behavior plan, but they don't make it automatic. That's why they need to have a behavior plan in place when on ADHD medication.

Good luck trying to work through this, it can be difficult even if you have control of all aspects.

Pam

hismineandours's picture

Submitted by hismineandours on Fri, 08/17/2012 - 2:45pm

I just thought everyone got EOBs for their prescriptions. I guess it is just our insurance company.

As far as his meds-he's been on about every available med for adhd. He maxes out the dosage very quickly. Currently he's supposed to be on 54mg of Concerta as well as Intuniv 2mg at bedtime. In the past he's been on Adderall, Vyvanse, Strattera as well as Remeron, Wellbutrin,Clonidine and Risperdal. He's seen a psychiatrist for years as well as seen just a family doctor for meds. He has also had an inpatient hospitalization. He's had psychological testing.

Not a one of those things has ever made any sort of significant difference. He lives with my mil now-so a behavior plan is pointless-she would never follow it. She also does not like to be told what to do and would perceive that as being told what to do. She is very accustommed to atrocious behavior in general, so whatever ss14 does is just everyday sort of normal behavior to her.