My DH and I have been together for 18 years, and we have two children together, My daughter is 17 and my son is 11. My SS was 1 when I met him. It's been 18 years of hell when he would come over twice a week. He has tormented both of my kids over the years hitting them "accidentally" My BD has suffered more than my BS, as they are close in age. When he comes over, my DH lets him do whatever he wants. I argue with my husband every time SS comes over, because he treats SS like he's above my two children. I have tried to explain that my two children have rules to follow, and SS needs to obey the house rules when he is here no matter how often or little time he spends here. DH says he doesn't want to discipline him because he's afraid he won't want to come over anymore. At one point I told my BD that if he hits her to hit him back...and when she did, he ratted on her right away saying she hit him for no reason. She told my DH (HER FATHER) that he hit her first, SS denied it and DH believed him and my BD got in trouble. Cut to present day....1 year ago SS moved out of State with his BM, came up last summmer, and stayed with us for 10 glorious (SARCASM) days!!! He pretty much used us as a pit stop to shower and eat...would bring his friends over and feed them too. My BS was playing a video game and SS went over and turned it off on him..when BS went to tell DH...SS ran into the room saying it was an "ACCIDENT"...I have told my DH over the years that SS is terrible to our kids and to talk to him, but to no avail. I have been forced to be the bad guy, making him resent me....not that I care, I will do whatever it takes to protect MY kids. I honestly wouldn't be upset in the least if I NEVER saw him again. Low and behold, he is coming up to visit in March for 10 days again...with his new girlfriend. Problem being, our house rule is that they can not sleep in the same room togehter. My BD has already brought this to my attnetion. I tried to bring it up to my DH the other night. I started out by asking him where SS intended on staying while he was in state. He said he didn't know, but if his son needed a place to stay than he was staying here. I said that that may pose an issue...and he cut me off and said the only issue it was gonna cause was the issues I was going to make. This happened on Friday, it is now Monday and I still have not spoken to my DH about it since. He did apologize and said he should have listened before he jumped down my throat, but I was so pissed off I didn't say anything as what I wanted to say is, I hate your kid, I don't want him here, I'm sick of him coming over and thinking he owns the place and if he stays here I'm leaving with my two kids. Needless to say, I have been stewing in this for days, hell years even. What do I do??!!!! I have tried to bond with this kid for 18 years, and I can't stand him!!! I've babysat him, cooked for him thrown birthday parties for him done all of his Christmas shopping...treated him like I would my own and never even got a thank you from him....it was always DH getting a thank you like he did all the work. I'm just so tired of the whole situation. I love my DH so much and don't want to hurt him or have him leave me over it, but I just can't pretend to care for this asshole kid anymore. I feel like I'm living a lie...and that is not me!!!