Am I wrong?
SS13 has not been turning in his homework - uses every excuse in the world. Days later, he magically finds it in his backpack. This has happened 5-6 times in the last week. I wish he could pull some money or a trip to Hawaii out of that magical backpack!
A few weeks ago, I told him he wouldn't play hockey during the coming weekend if the grade didn't go up. He managed to pull it together. Since then, other grades have gotten bad and this time I took his phone and brand new birthday i-pod. I'm reluctant to take hockey because he plays on an elite team and the team is also punished. AND...I need to save my big "gun"!!
He just left to be dropped off with his "mom" for Thanksgiving and won't be back until Saturday. He asked for his phone so he could keep in touch with us. He NEVER calls us when he is with her, it's just a ploy to get the phone. I said no and got the "you're so f-ing stupid look". THEN he had the nerve to ask for the i-pod!
He left without saying goodbye to me or the rest of the family that was here. I'm left to feel like sh*t about the way I'm being treated.
I know I'm doing the right thing, but I'm sooo tired of being the bad guy. I've tried to disengage but I'm obviously doing something wrong!
- jaohlund's blog
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Comments
Rejoice! You won! He needs a
Rejoice! You won!
He needs a lesson that no means no and not "well OK but just this ONCE!"
Being fair means he will get it back when his grades are raised. When they drop he loses them.
As for missing playing on the team, I can see why that is a 'big gun'. Buit there are other players. And he needs a lesson that he is not irreplacable. If he got a college scholarship for hockey he would be required to keep up his grades. So this is just the beginning of a lifetime of lessons.
And now sad, he will have to sit around and actually TALK to people. How horrid! LOL
PS: I love being the 'bad guy'. IN my world this means "Look, I am teaching you consequences for your actions. Better from me than from a future employer..."
Thank you!! The smart part
Thank you!! The smart part of my brain knows that what I'm doing is the right thing. It's just so exhausting sometimes!! They say parenting isn't for wimps - I'd say that's even more true for step parenting!!
I agree about teaching consequences. I would add "better than from a courtroom judge" to your "better than from a future employer".
Happy Thanksgiving!
Where is his dad? Why isn't
Where is his dad? Why isn't he handling this?
Where is his dad? Why isn't
Where is his dad? Why isn't he handling this?