Oh, I’ve missed StepTalk. I haven’t had time to post lately. Here’s a re-cap before I vent – SD6 is not DH’s daughter but we still taking her every other week Sunday through Friday. SS4 is with us Sunday-Sunday, while SD6 goes to her biodad’s that weekend.

We bought SD6 a cute fuzzy unicorn hat a few weeks ago. She loved it. (Of course, the reason behind NEEDING to buy her a hat is because BM neglects to send one with her on our weeks, and won’t cooperate to drop one off/pick it up).

Fast forward to this Saturday. I actually got the opportunity to go out with a friend while DH stayed home with BS and some buddies watching hockey. This was BM’s weekend with skids. I purposely steered clear of the bar that she frequents, thinking I’d either run into her or her friends and it’d be annoying. I walk into the bar we chose, go to the bathroom, and practically run into BM. She did a move like she had the thought to hide, but then realized it would be impossible so she said “Hi.” I said “Hi there,” in a disgusted tone and kept walking. When I walked back to my friend at the bar, a guy passed me. He was wearing a fuzzy unicorn hat….I thought “Hey…SD6 has that hat….wait…that IS SD6’s hat!” as he walked over to where BM was. A wave of anger came over me. I wanted to go walk over to him and say “I bought that, thank you,” and steal it off his grimey head. But of course, I didn’t. I should have.

They bolted shortly after that. Obviously had to run “home” to their usual spot. So we went on with our night, yada yada.

Sunday (yesterday) I was out and about so we agreed I’d pick up the kids from BM’s to start our Sunday visitation. I got there at 5. Kids were in their pajamas. BM looked like she was ready to go out again – ALL gussied up! And of course, the unicorn hat is nowhere to be seen. Later, SD6 starts spilling the beans.

They hadn’t eaten since breakfast. They were wearing the same pajamas they went to sleep in FRIDAY NIGHT…had worn them all day the day before too. They got in trouble that morning because they woke up “too early” so BM didn’t let them play outside at all. BM was also napping all day, so they had to stay in their room with their door shut and play quietly. So let’s get this straight: BM can nap all day, get over her hangover, get herself ready, and go out again on a Sunday night, but she can’t tell her kids to take a shower/bath or get dressed or feed them?
DH ended up texting her bc he didn’t want to fight with her on the phone last night since we had the kids. He said “We don’t buy things for SD6 so that your bf can wear them to the bar and then we never get them back. You owe us $12 for that hat. And I believe that it’s more important to feed/bathe your children than to take a nap.” BM’s response? “The unicorn hat is here, she didn’t want to wear it, so settle down psycho. And I will take a nap whenever I plz, thx.”
UGH! She usually just makes poor parenting decisions but I feel like she is tip toeing the line of neglect with this one, right?

I'm thinking we'll start keeping receipts of everything we spend on SD6 and asking BM for reimbursement...that won't fly well though.

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A few other things that have been BM stupidity:
- The last weekend she had the kids (not this recent one), they were literally at her mom’s house from Friday until they came to our house on Sunday. Not because BM was out of town or anything. She just needed the weekend “off”.

- She told us that SD6 looks like an “idiot” in her school pictures, and blamed it on her hairdo that day. It was to put ME down (like I can’t do her hair! We did two French braids/pig tails and it was adorable – maybe it got messed up that morning at school or whatever) because I am the one who got her ready that day. But she said it about her RIGHT IN FRONT OF HER, and the poor thing was crushed. DH said, “I’m sure she looked adorable, you are the prettiest little girl” and she lit up….while BM rolled her eyes.

- On Halloween BM refused to cooperate with us so that we could see the kids in their costumes and they could see their little brother in his – spinning it to make herself look like such a good mom. They were home by 6:40 and she wouldn’t let us come see them dressed up because they needed to take baths and go to bed. At 6:40 on Halloween.

- Last Sunday she came to pick up SS4 and the first thing she says is “What are you WEARING? You look like a hobo.” His pants were just a little bit short, but they were khakis and he was wearing a shirt that matched them….the only thing “wrong” was they were just a bit short, but with shoes they were fine. But the previous Sunday it was okay for her to bring him over to our house in a grubby, stained HUGE t-shirt and size 2T pajama pants that were LITERALLY capris on him. He’s in 5/6 size clothes. She always send him to our house in clothes too small for him, so DH said to her on this instance “If you ever bought him clothes that fit, we’d send them back to you. We have to keep all of our clothes we buy him here, otherwise we never see them again.” She didn’t have a comeback.