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"It smells like pee"

newbiemommy's picture

I have begun to refuse to clean up after my SD 10 who pees herself and the bed at least once a day. Therefore she has had many "accident free" days. *eyeroll* Really SO just never checks so she sleeps in pee and her clothes just sit there instead of getting washed. Well, today he's doing her laundry. She brings out her clothes only and the entire area smells awful. His only comment, "It smells like pee" She ignores him and continues watching tv. Then gets rewarded 5 minutes later with MY butter toffee popcorn. *¿¡$#&@%!?

Comments

newbiemommy's picture

When he said something it was unusual for him so I was thinking, "This is it, he's finally going to do something" And then I just sat there in shock that that's all he did/said. I kept waiting for him to say something else!

sixteensmom's picture

A few more times bringing daddy pee soaked clothes ought to do it. or, even better, pick a fight so he has to go sleep in her bed after she goes back to bm. He'll flip!

newbiemommy's picture

He won't even go in her room. Then he would have to acknowledge it... He would take the couch any day. I do how you are right though. That's why HE does her laundry now. I'm hopping after a few times he says enough is enough.

Kes's picture

I have a friend who is a nurse and adopts the following approach with younger children who wet their knickers - I expect it would also work with a 10year old. It is probably not helpful to make them feel guilty because she is not doing it on purpose and probably feels bad enough anyway. The approach is that you acknowledge the problem and get the child to help you clear up - they fetch mop and bucket if there is mess on the floor, put knickers/sheets/pyjamas in the washing machine and remake the bed with you - with waterproof undersheet would obviously be wise.
It would obviously be preferable if SO was the one taking the lead on this rather than you - especially if you have disengaged.

newbiemommy's picture

I believe it is on purpose. There's a lot involved in this story but basically issue got 100x worse when she didn't get her way and I had a baby. When I left and she had daddy to herself magically bed is dry. And I've tried EVERYTHING. Making get help clean it up, then making her clean it up with just my supervision, getting in trouble, ignoring it. So now I've disengaged. I'm done trying when my SO does NOTHING.

RaeRae's picture

No way in hell I'd clean up my SD10's pee bed. She can sleep in it, smell like it, wear it, I will not do it. (Granted, if it were to happen, she wouldn't be in my living room on my couches or my carpet or in my kitchen or in my car either). When a child of this age does something of this magnitude, they should be the ones taking care of the mess, washing sheets and clothes, cleaning beds/floors, and showering. On top of being grounded.

It's not a STEP thing with me, either. I'd do the same for my own kids if their asses were so lazy, or they were trying to prove some point, by peeing on themselves.

oneoffour's picture

I would collect as much peed on clothing as possible and mail it to him at work. In fact threaten him with this... Honey, either you deal with this and get it to stop or I will start collecting her peed on clothing and mail it to you at work. I wonder how the person who opens the mail will find this behaviour? Because it is NOT normal. And stop feeding YOUR daughter MY popcorn. ... Me? Childish? Really? You are letting a 10 yr old wet herself and you do not see anything wrong with it. Wait until her first sleepover. In fact she will not be able to go to sleepovers.."