I am sooooo glad I found this site!! I am a mother of 5- soon to be 6. Relationship back on with childhood sweetheart that is wonderfuland has been for over 2 years. DH has DS18 and DS3.5. Both boys have a ton of issues. They are the only thing we disagree on. Esp. SS3 with new diagnosis of classic autism. Dh mentioned to BM developmental delays years ago and she refused to have him evaluated stating that SS3's only problems revoloved around his "abandonment by his father"! Long story short- guess who's doing the therapy and interventions with SS3??? Yes that would be me! BM stated he isn't ready to potty train. I had him trained in 5 days- he was so proud and went back to BM only to be put in diapers. Funny how things work out- after igonoring all DH concerns (alot of which were prompted by me)- SS3 gets a diagnosis- and BAM she is now a parenting expert. I do not want to end up being the step monster for disagreeing with BM but she has 1 child who is 3. I have 5 ages 19, 15, 12, 8 and 1 and am a nurse! Dh ignores SS3 behavior which infuriates me. I don't know what BM does as home and would hate to accuse her of bad parenting as I don't think that is fair. In my experience (and yes I have dealt with special needs in my own children- not autism), alot of his behavior is nothing but lack of discipline and structure. I want to help SS but don't want to do it alone. I have alot to do. I love this child and feel he needs more than what he is getting. How do I know what my role is?? Dh states he supports my ideas and believes I am right...as he sits in the garage! :?