Dear Valued Users,
It's with a heavy heart that we announce the permanent closure of StepTalk.org on August 31st, 2025.
This decision wasn't an easy one. For over twenty years, StepTalk has been a source of support for stepparents around the world! However, over the years, the costs associated with maintaining and upgrading the site to remain secure, meet current standards and maintain availability have become unsustainable.
We are incredibly grateful for your support, contributions and the community you've helped us build. Your engagement has made StepTalk.org a special place and we cherish the memories and connections made here.
We would especially like to thank Aniki for volunteering to be a moderator and for caring so much.
Thank you for being a part of our journey and we wish you all the best.
Sincerely,
Dawn and The StepTalk Team
Comments
I am also a Generation Y and
I am also a Generation Y and read this article. I believe there are exceptions like myself
But my brother who is 18 months younger than me and one of my good friends who is a year older than me falls into this category. I have a 26 year old friend that still lives in her parents basement. I don't know why people want to be dependent. Then again ever since I was 7 I wanted to be on my own according to my mother! LOL.
Example: My two sds are both
Example:
My two sds are both high school drop outs, on welfare, unemployed, etc.
MY two Bio are college educated, employed, own homes, pay their own bill and have their own lives..
What is the difference between these two sets of kids? Why the difference? USUALLY, not always, but they turn out according how they are raised. Hell, do you think my kids would have gone to school if I had not made them? Hell no, so I made them. I had standards and expectations. My hubby has no standards or expectations for his daughters. It is less trouble for him and ex to just give their kids money and get them down the road and out of their hair.
I agree, TOTALLY!!!!! SD24 -
I agree, TOTALLY!!!!!
SD24 - high school drop out, baby maker, hangs out with people of the same caliber
SS26 - works a menial part time job, no ambition, no future plans, says he's gay (when it suits him). His friends are people who he can manipulate and bully.
Bio Daughter - college educated, excellent job, married. Friends are all college educated and working.
And YES, it all boils down to parental expectations and standards! And, sometimes, it just means keeping your boot up their butt and keeping them in line!!!! There were times when mine was a teenager I wasn't sure if she'd survive (without one of us killing her!). We had to stay one step ahead of her the entire time! DH let his kids do whatever they wanted. It was just easier to ignore them than to instill values and work ethic in them. Their BM thinks everything is wonderful, as long as she can be their friend. HIS mess, not mine!
Huh - apparently I'm (barely)
Huh - apparently I'm (barely) Gen Y. I always thought I was Gen X.
I'll admit it, I was a useless slacker when I was a early-20-something. I flunked out of college repeatedly because (say it with me here) THERE WERE NO CONSEQUENCES. My parents just shook their heads and tut-tutted, and said, "do better next semester." Permissive parenting at its best!
I finally got sick of myself when I was 25 and enlisted in the military. 10 years later, I make ~$60k/year, bought my first house (alone) five years ago, and DH and I have something close to six figures in savings. But I had to self-start.
Rather than permissive parenting, my folks should have kicked my lazy butt out after the second failing semester, and made me get loans or pay for college myself after the first one. But they thought they were doing something good for me. I'm not sure I can blame them - their method worked with my sister, who graduated from college debt free and has never asked for a dime since.
I did the two years of
I did the two years of college with few passed classes thing. After my sophomore year my parents told me they were moving to TX and I could join them or stay in AZ for school. I told them I would stay. They said "then pay for it yourself".
I then asked "when do WE move?"
They payed for my first two years of college, I paid for 6 then they helped with my last two.
I did finish school and have done well professionally.
My younger brother got the same treatment I did and we actually graduated together.
My wife and I have done well but my younger brother has the success gene I guess. He does extremely well.
NC, I appreciate your experiences and in many ways they remind me of my own. Congrats to you and DH on your financial success and thanks for your service.
Best regards,