You are here

A few questions- Missouri Law?

Last-Wife's picture

Submitted by Last-Wife on Sun, 01/30/2011 - 5:17pm

1. If PITA 16 is refusing to visit his mother because he found drugs in her house, can we be held in contempt of the visitation order? As an athlete, he follows his school's "no drug" policy, that strictly prohibits kids from being around drugs. He's very serious about keeping his body healthy. He has confronted her about her smoking, and drinking, and has told her he doesn't want to be around it. since he refuses to go there, we have set up other visits for PITA to get together with Loca Grande at sporting events and local restaurants, and then she always backs out at the last minute...

2. We've never received official CS for the skids, due to her mental instability and financial sitaution since she can't keep a job longer than 3 months at a time...But she chips in when she can, and makes promises to pay certain things. If she has made a promise and then backs out, or refuses to pay enough to cover PITA, since he won't visit, can we take her back to court or mediation and get CS? (Can she legally do that- just pay for one?)

Thanks for any input you can provide!

Comments

jenstep's picture

Submitted by jenstep on Sun, 01/30/2011 - 5:47pm

I'm another non-Missouri-ian but I have done a lot of research in this field. Most states don't have a magic age where children are allowed to make those types of decisions. But a judge will certainly listen to a child of that age's wishes. Especially under these circumstances. I am all for covering my ass so what I would do would be to file a child custody modification (if you have the dough to do it) based on the 16 year old's discoveries and wishes. If she's smart (and how many of our BMs are?) she wouldn't fight it b/c it could lead to a full trial where all this info could come out and totally screw her. In our state all child custody modification requests that are not immediately agreed upon are required to go thru mediation and then if no agreement can be reached then you go to trial.

As far as the money goes, if it's not in the custody order then she's not legally obligated to pay. I suppose you could get her to sign a document and have it notarized and then it might hold up in a court of law. But let me tell you my mistake: my DH, a sweet and wonderful person who always sees the best in people, never asked for CS. And here we are 7 years later and we haven't received a dime. She doesn't work either but our state minimum is (I think) $266/month TOTAL for my 2 SSs. Aren't your children entitled to that money? I think DH is finally coming around to seeking support (basically b/c I'm strong-arming him). We eat ramen every Thursday night. Chicken breast would be a nice change. Sure, $266/month wouldn't pay for school supplies and school clothes and school lunches and school sport expenses etc etc etc. But...Take her back to court for the custody modification and while you're at it get some child support. These women who think they don't have to financially support their children really chafe my heinie.

Elizabeth's picture

Submitted by Elizabeth on Tue, 02/01/2011 - 9:03am

I am in Missouri. We experienced this in reverse. SD17 refused to come see DH for her visitation. DH took BM to court for contempt of visitation because BM was actually the one facilitating it by telling SD17 she didn't have to come down, refusing to meet DH halfway to exchange SD17, blocking DH's number from SD17's cell phone, etc. Bottom line, judge said there wasn't enough proof that BM was denying visitation and that if it was SD17 interfering with visitation, there was nothing the judge could do about it. So, I would say no, you wouldn't be found to be in contempt.