Am I wrong to feel this way?
I'm pretty sure I posted a blog once before that had something to do with the fact that SD's mom doesn't contribute ANYTHING to help with raising her own daughter. But... I seem to be the ONLY one who's getting fed up with it. Money is EXTREMELY tight for us since we have 6 children total to buy for plus our bills and SD's mom doesn't send child support, buy her own daughter birthday gifts (she buys her Christmas presents but she keeps them at HER house and SD's only there about 3 months out of the year) she doesn't help with clothing or school supplies, school fees... NOTHING. She's been telling SD on the phone that the store is all out of what she wanted to get her for her birthday and that's been going on since September. Yet DH doesn't seem to care and honestly it irritates me. That woman (SD's mom) is allowed to just go about daily life without worrying about whether or not there's enough money for socks, shoes, shirts, jeans or a field trip... she and her BF only have ONE child in their care and so my feeling is that she should have to help out at least a LITTLE. Whether it be picking her daughter some clothes up from even the Goodwill and sending her back with them. Am I overstepping my bounds here or is it okay for me to ask DH why he doesn't seem to care?
- N8tiveButt3rfly's blog
- Log in or register to post comments
Comments
I would ask...it is your
I would ask...it is your household also and it is not like you are wanting anything more than some help. Present it that way...we need a little help and it would be great if you (DH) would find out how our county deals with CP.....I live in a county where they are the toughest on child support so maybe you need to do a little research and then talk to hubby
Our BM is the same. She
Our BM is the same. She dosen't pay CS or buy the girls presnets for any occasion. We thought about taking her to court but the amount we would get from her would be less then the lawyer fees for the entire time until they are 18 so.....what is the point. Take all into consideration is it going to be beneficial or will she hold it over you. Definitly discuss it with your DH but think of everything.
I had the talk with DH and
I had the talk with DH and came to find out that he's been feeling just as frustrated if not MORE than I. He's decided to enlist the help of child support enforcement. They have a program here that is free of charge and they obtain a court order based on both parents' incomes and then they also enforce it. Thanks to you all of you for lending support and advice on how to approach the situation. I didn't even know that DH had already started looking into it and found legal help... BIG weight off!!!
Hello - same boat. BM hasn't
Hello - same boat. BM hasn't had a job in 5 years - just sponges off her guy of the moment. She only sees her 2 sons for a few minutes every week (supervised visitation ya know). We thought about trying for CS anyway (even though we will never see a dime) b/c if she ever gets it back together and somehow gets some kind of custody she will immediately file for child support. If we've got some arrears built up against her that may help us out. I have heard reports that a court can calculate CS based on minimum wage even if the NCP doesn't have a job. Has anyone had any experience with this?
in my experience, if the NCP
in my experience, if the NCP doesn't have income (i.e. jail, no job, not high enough income), they don't pay. we experienced this three times: once when BM was in jail and again when she claimed she waitressed but couldn't afford child support (she didn't add her tips to total income, which you're supposed to) and again when she was participating in illegal activities to make money (obviously couldn't document that). but basically, if she can't/won't document an income, she doesn't have to pay. sorry, it sucks.
Id talk to DH but not sure
Id talk to DH but not sure where it would get you. BM here pays for nothing but wants her kids to have the best of everything of course. She is always comparing what my birth children get and her kids get which I try to do the same for all of them. Yet, allows her boyfriend to pay childsupport for his daughters and gets them every other weekend. Bet, they also get Santa and Christmas from their Daddy as well. I am so thinking about going to DHR and just seeing what amount she is supposed to be paying a month for these kiddoes and letting my husband in on the information.