The way I see it, that is assault. First offense for a similar situation in "the real world" would be community service at the very least. She's lucky you didn't have her arrested. I can't say I'd be that nice to my own kids if they did that let alone SD. A week of community service in exchange for not having her arrested sounds very fair to me. }:)

BM may have given her the ipod, but you can not allow her to bring it to your home until her attitude changes and I agree with the others....nothing wrong with a little labor to show community service.

i think priveleges would be lost indefinitely until she lost the attitude to start. In addition, i like the idea of community service, except you'll be right there doing it with her. sounds like DH needs to whoop somebody's ass.

honestly i would probably do what you just said, run over it and said those words "my face must of broke it when you threw it at me". I wouldn't care if bm bought it, she can buy another one! lol jk but that is very rude of her she needs manners and definitely another punishment.

The ipod would be gone, forever. I don't care if BM bought it, she gave it to SD and I would make sure she never got it back again. I don't think I'd destroy it though, I'd keep it and use it myself whenever SD wasn't around.

I say tell her she's going to do a week of community service at so&so place and if she doesn't then the cops will be called for assault. Sign her up at a place where they have to sign in and out to prove they were there. If she doesn't live with you ten instead of a week tell her she has to do x-amt of hours. She can do them while at mom's or on days you have her. Bm isn't going to like you punishingjer kid though so whatever is done needs to come from dh, even if it is your idea. If you have markings on your face from the iPod then take a picture to show sd that you are serious about going to the cops about assault charges. Btw, I like that idea that 'oops the iPod broke when you threw it at me'. That is funny!

When to call the cops?! This would be the time & situation. At no time should any physical aggression should be tollerated; it requires immediate intervention. Never, ever should a child be allowed to show physical aggression toward any other person in the family, but in particular, a parent. I think the consequences should be legal. What would have happened if she actually hurt you eyeball?!?!! I would call the police and file a report. Then I would take her to counseling.

You can still call the police. What they do here in our community with these kiddos is the court order them to counseling and make them do the community service. It sounds as if both of things in order. This was completely unacceptable and i worry that if she gets away with it this time then she'll do it again

I agree with hismineandours, you can still file a report with the police. They will possibly do the counseling and community service. If you do nothing, you are sending the message it's ok and this behavior will only escalate! We fear the thought of these kids getting in trouble with the law if we turn them in, at the expense if our phyiscal safety.

I would've gave her the dirtiest look, then walked away, grabbed a hammer and WHAM! She would've lost it :jawdrop: ...hehehehe. That would DEF. make you feel better and then tell her the phone is next. So let that happen again and your lucky that's all I did and it can be replaced, but it WONT. Laugh and leave. BM wont be thrilled, but it will still make you smile

Or take her on a tour of Juvy. Let her see what happens when kids get into big trouble. Let her volunteer there for a day. She might think twice after that. I like option one better but both sound like a plan to me.

Breaking her Ipod would have been the least that I would have done. Your DH needs to handle this and with BM. That is assault. Tell him if you don't like the punishment, then you are filing a police report. Watch how fast he and BM move then.

the little bitch should be thrilled her teeth weren't knocked down her throat..... i applaud your composure....

i definitely agree to file a report with the police..... this may happen again and then you file another report.... you don't want it to happen 10 times before the 1st report

if it were me, the ipod & phone would probably have a mysterious ill fate...... liquid in the battery compartment usually causes a problem..... computer privileges would be gone for an indefinite amouont of time... and if the little snot nose needs it for homework i would be breathing down her neck watching every move!

and i would make her visits about as miserable as i possibly could.. i would have no snacks or drinks available to her ~~ water and maybe liver for dinner...

I agree with most of the ladies on here...file a police report...NOW! Get a record going. If she is anything like my SD, she will only get more and more agressive. I have already asked my DH what he will do when his daughter hits me--because I know this will happen. She already "play slaps" with him...not his face or head, usually his arm or leg (not that the location should matter)--usually when they are playing/joking around, but I can tell that she is pushing the limit and hitting harder and harder...just seeing how hard it can be before DH tells her to stop. DH knows that I won't play around with this subject (although, I'm sure he thinks I am exaggerating). SD and I don't play that way, so if she does ever hit me...it will be for real...and the cops will be called at once. To be honest, as physically threatening as she is with others, I don't doubt that it will come to that some day...

When is the right time to call the police? Again, I've read enough material on the subject and it say nip it immediately, do nit tolerate it because it will not get better. And...if you have other children they will mimic that behavior as well. When not if she does it again, what are you going to do? Are you going to wait until she really really really hurts you like stabbing you or actually aiming for your face, stomach or heart before the police know about it. No act of physical volence is excusable nor should it be tolerated. Especially by a child toward a parent. It's probably one of the most difficult things you will do, but it's either now or later when it's worse.