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How do i get FH not to

stepmom-at20's picture

How do i get FH not to go into BM's house when picking up ss4?

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christsluv2u's picture

You can't unless he wants to stop. He is an independent person with his own free will and you can't make him do anything.

Ask yourself why it bothers you so much. Are you just jealous because it is BM? Does he stay for coffee? Does he sit on the sofa with BM and engage in 4 hour conversations about his love life? Or is he just there picking up the kid, comes inside, talks about how the kid is doing and then leaves?

This isn't a hill I would die on. It is a good thing when BM and BD can get along enough to be in each other's company and not fight.

Jen

herewegoagain's picture

I can sympathize with you...again, there are always two sides...I have a feeling if you did the same if you had an ex-husband/child, he would be flipping out...somehow, the person who has the ex/child doesn't see anything wrong with it...but usually the one who sees nothing wrong with it, doesn't have to deal with it with their spouse either...

The only way my DH has ever understood anything was for me to tell him "how would you feel if I did X"...sometimes he would come up with the BS of, "but you don't have a kid, so you don't know"...so I would find a perfect situation where he COULD relate...that normally does it...

Good luck...I don't see why he should either...sorry with anyone who disagrees...

jojo68's picture

I don't have a problem with that at all...but if it makes you feel uncomfortable...go with him when he goes inside. And definately what herewegoagain said about turning the situation around and asking him "What if I......" works wonders! Good luck!