You are here

Update on needing advice

cantmissamy's picture

Submitted by cantmissamy on Tue, 02/16/2010 - 5:19pm

I just totally blew up at ss15, he wanted some chips and I told him that I payed for the food in this house and he could goto grandma's house to eat since he wanted to tell her everything that went on in the house anyways. Dh said it was uncalled for, and right now I really dont give a damn.Dh stormed out and I told him to take ss with him if he was leaving. I honestly dont want to walk on egg shells everytime I do something or say something around here.

Comments

soverysad's picture

Submitted by soverysad on Tue, 02/16/2010 - 5:24pm

I know it sucks, but good for you. If dh was handling ss15's behavior you wouldn't have to do it.

"A pessimist complains about the wind, an optimist counts on the wind changing, a realist adjusts his sails"

Thetis's picture

Submitted by Thetis on Tue, 02/16/2010 - 5:25pm

... It was alittle immature of a comment...
I don't think you're going to have much success productively talking to DH and SS today.

LMR120's picture

Submitted by LMR120 on Tue, 02/16/2010 - 5:34pm

I know having skids is very stressful especially ones that dont respect you that being sad, I think the comment you made to him was uncalled for. I know he is 15 and wants to act like an adult but you have to remember he is just a kid. What are your thoughts on why he acts the way he does?

DISbelief's picture

Submitted by DISbelief on Tue, 02/16/2010 - 5:40pm

I guess I don't know the whole story... I will have to go back and read through your past threads. I am kinda impressed that a 15 year old boy actually asked permission to EAT something. I have 2 15 year old nephews that just PLOW through my kitchen every time they come over!! I am sorry you are so frustrated that it has come to this point. Take a deep breath, I know your heart is pounding out of your chest right now (I know the feeling). Think about the situation... maybe you over reacted?? Like I said, I need to read your past posts, but I think maybe you have lashed out at the wrong person. 15 is still a kid that makes stupid mistakes trying to please people.. maybe? I don't know this kid, but I know kids in general, and they don't always think things through when they are in the moment, or put in an awkward or high pressure situation. Maybe call gramma and have a conversation with her?!?!? Just a suggestion.

DISbelief~

~You have to BE crazy to UNDERSTAND crazy!~ Wink

BMJen's picture

Submitted by BMJen on Tue, 02/16/2010 - 5:41pm

I think you are under alot of stress for the situation that you are in.

Isn't it strange that we will finally blow over a kid asking for some chips, but will take the daily slaps in the face? I guess so many slaps eventually make the person weak and blowing up is easy to do after so much.

I reread your first blogs. It seems as though you are, right now, the other woman. As he is married to someone else. That alone will put so much stress on your man that he doesn't know how to respond. Guilt is hard on a man.

But I can tell you that pushing his child away will do nothing for your relationship. You're going to have to put on your understanding and compassion hat right now and be there to support him and his child. This boy is dealing with the fact that his mom and dad won't ever be together again. Your man is dealing with the fact this his necular family will never be in tact again. You are there in the mix with normal feelings.........with no where to turn in this.

If you want to talk PM me and I'll help as much as I can. I'm sure there are a million things that I don't know. But I'm willing to hear them if you want to talk about them.

(((hugs)))