Men generally sum up comments and total up good and bads of everything.
We are wired to fix problems so when you vent, it comes across as a complaint.

If you can think about the things you say to him and keep track you might find that maybe you do seem unhappy to him.
But I wouldn't underestimate what you think is not a complaint.
You have to think of it like he would.

Every time you say something is wrong he wants to fix it.
If the thing can't be fixed? do to timing, or it is to small to worry about it builds up as complaints to him.
And it represents an unhappy person to him and makes him upset because he feels he can't help.

(Just a thought to ponder.)

I know how you feel. When its just me and the hubby I'm so happy . Then the kids get home from school and I'm in a bad mood. Is it bad of me to want my own kids when most the time I don't like my to sk ????

I am so glad that a man responded to this question with a male perspective.

Women and men communicate differently and find different things worthy of comment. In general, women talk more than men, because we find it necessary to give our comment on things more than men do. Men usually talk very little, and only as much as necessary. They aren't going to mention something they don't like unless they are ready to do something about it.

I sometimes have to step back and think, what have our conversations lately been about? And then I will realize, that even though I have had a really good day or week, the only things I commented TO HIM about were negative, which makes him upset thinking I am unhappy. As he continues to THINK that I am unhappy, he gets more upset and his behavior (because men don't talk, men act) gets worse and worse - which DOES make me unhappy. When I feel this happening, I make an effort to change my behavior and the things that I say to reflect to him that I am happy and positive. This usually has a dramatic effect on his mood and how he thinks I feel.

But yet again, you have to think... your DH spends more time with you and is more intimate with you than anyone else (I would hope). If he thinks you are unhappy, maybe you really ARE generally unhappy with how your [family] life is going right now. I don't know you very well, but looking through your past blogs I get a real feeling that you probably AREN'T happy - with your marraige, your SKids, your DH's ex, and basically the whole situation.

Think about it - are you upset because he asked the question, and you're NOT unhappy... or because he asked the question, and you ARE...

*~So sayeth Nymh~*