Here is another action that speaks louder than her words. She didn't show up to ss5 p/t conference. It doesn't really surprise me, but I made sure dh reminded her just in case she had forgotten. It's crazy to me that she says she wants to be involved and wants to know everything, but doesn't really make an effort. If she didn't go I would have like to just to hear from the teacher herself what my ss needs. He is actually doing pretty good in school. He is a young 5y/o in kindergarten but the teacher says that he is actually pretty smart. He just has a really short attention span. The teacher has also said that ss has been late four times so far this year. His bm has taken him to school only 10 times since school has started. He is also at least 15 minutes late to school. The kids are already on the carpet starting class when he walks in. He is also crying...why? I have no clue. We won't get a straight answer from bm so I asked ss...He said that he wanted to take pop to school. Who knows. I've also counted since ss has started school mom hasn't came to pick up ss 5 out of 10 times she was supposed to. She also has only came to 2 out of 6 football games.

None of this surprises me. She told dh that she is getting a car on sunday, but she has said that many times before. When she didn't have a cell phone for 5 months she told dh every week that she was getting one. He finally wrote her a letter saying that if she didn't fix the cell phone issue we would end up back in court. We had no way of contacting ss or bm to notify her of anything.

I'm not getting angry about any of this anymore. She was always afraid that dh was trying to replace her with me. He never had that intention. She on the other hand is going to replace herself if she doesn't get involved. She needs to be involved for my ss. Honestly, I really don't like it when she's around because I'm left standing out in the cold so to speak, but before long he will realize that I'm not the bad person in our situation. I am here because I want to be and that I'm involved because I love him not because I feel obligated.

I wish bm and I could have a civil relationship at least. I believe that would make ss more comfortable when everyone is around each other. She has someone who she is dating and we let ss know that it's ok to love him too. My ss has enough love to go around especially when so many people love him too. I've tried reaching out to her on social networking sites, but I never get a thank you for giving her a special story about ss or anything. I tried to stop by and get her money for school pictures so she didn't have to make a trip to the school. She lives 30 min away. She said no that she would go monday. I guess she didn't because we didn't get any extra pictures. I guess that's her loss then. I asked Dh if we should send one with him to give to her...he says no. I want to make sure ss is allowed to love his bm however he wants when he's here so he doesn't feel like he can't love her when he's here. I guess I don't want him to feel like he's missing out being with her because we aren't allowing him to love her in anyway he wants...does that make sense. Also with halloween coming up ss wanted to go to bm houses and go with her trick or treating. I told him that we could stop by there and that if bm wanted to go trick or treating with us then she could come to the town we're trick or treating in. He told her that she could come and then dh told her that we would stop by. She said she just wanted a picture anyway. Dh and I were talking about how bm refuses to allow dh to see ss when it's her time and we have something we would like to do with him. She always says that, "oh danny (her bf) has something really special planned for the kids" or that "I have a lot going on" If dh would tell her that I had something special planned with ss then all hell would break loose. She would be slandering me on facebook and myspace with all her family and friends letting me have it. She tells dh that her bf is around anymore and then the next day he is with her at ss football game. It doesn't make any sense! Anyway, back on the subject of Halloween dh decided to tell bm that we would have time to stop by and again all she said she wanted was a picture. BM has refused to give dh any pictures of ss when he was a baby and will not give any of the baby book information to dh. She says those are her memories and not dh's. She just won't give them to him because of me I'm sure. She doesn't want me to know any of that I guess so she can hold on to knowing that info only. I don't know.

Thanks for listening!