Left out
I always read about how stepparents feel left out many times. But I never really felt like this before.
SD5 came back from being with her grandparents for almost a month. And things were very close to what I expected in the first place. She wasn't very particularly "excited" to see me or anything.
SD5 shares a bond with DH that I wil never ever be part of. Obviously, and that is ok.
I felt like a stranger in my own house, is like I was SOOOOOO used to having DH by myself, that pretty much spoiled me. LOL
I will be traveling out of the country in about 3 days. I CAN'T WAIT to leave, seriously, I wish I could hop in plane RIGHT NOW and just leaveeeeeeeeeee... It feels so awkward right now... Like the family is the two of them and I'm the outsider? Hmmmm...
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Comments
Actually
DH doesn't really exclude me... but sill
YES
That is a HUGE part of it...
If I see them all sweet, is like, I'm just in a corner, LEFT OUT, and I don't have my lil baby to hug and kiss
Black and White Thinking..
It gets us all in trouble.
You think because he loves his daughter, it takes away from the bond that you have. When in reality it absolutely does not. If he loves her, does that mean he doesn't love you? or vice versa? Of course not.
We're human. We want to cherish bonds without outside influences. But it's part of life, we're always evolving. The world takes a toll and all we can do is adapt. We can't keep wishing that it could go "back to the way it was" or hoping that it could be a certain way "if only".
You are not "sharing" a man. You are merely sharing time and accepting that his time is needed by others than just you. This is not a bad thing. It's just a part of life. Don't place all your happiness and value in just one person, this is a recipe for codependence and will only result in frustration. If you feel alienated, change your surroundings so that it is all inclusive. Or allow them alone time and embrace your own independence.
The only part of this equation you have the power to change... is you.
"For every ailment under the sun....There is a remedy, or there is none;
If there be one, try to find it; If there be none, never mind it." ~ W.W. Bartley
SS hear for last few days of his summer week with us
I cant tell you the last time we ate together. They eat all day long until 4pm then they eat dinner around 8 or 9pm. I am eating my dinner alone by the computer while I am writing this. It has an upside tho, I have peace thru my dinnertime.