I feel like I'm in the middle if a loosing battle. I have step kids and a bio kid. One step child(9) is not a bad kid. The normal call down occasionally is about it, the other is the issue. He is sassy, yells at us, tells my 2 year old to do stuff that I just said don't do. I've tried disengaging and letting DH do it all and he was doing good backing me up for a few months and then this week BAM it's back to let the kid say whatever he wants and he does nothingn about it. This child puts my kid up to saying curse words (even in church). I tell mine to not bite nails and get fingers out of your mouth ... SK says do it again. He's told me "I don't have to listen to you or do what u say & my daddy doesn't care if I don't". He's drawn back to hit me more than once. You correct him and he huff puffs and blows, stomps around & yells (which in turn does cause him to get yelled at, sent to room, sometimes spanking by DH). He has anger management issues (well duh). For the most part my DH only steps up when he is getting the tantrum thrown on him. If I call SK out or fuss or discipline DH acts like I'm being mean and just punishing him bc he's my SS and not mine biologically. If I say well I wasn't allowed to do that or I would have got my butt busted he all but says I'm lying. I'm well aware that my husband is to blame for a lot of this bc no one has ever controlled him.. I've been told to shut up in front of the kids, he tells them just to do what I say so no one has to hear me run my mouth... And I've td him if he can't be any more respectful than that it's no wonder his kids aren't either. Disengaging does nothing except get me told I hate his kids & my life goal is to make them miserable.
I tried being calm with this kid and he just pushes and pushes till u react.
I feel like I start off mad at the kid for being a jerk and them I get even more mad when DH does nothing .. Then i continue to be mad at SK bc he got away with it ..