She got a MAN!!!
BM finally got a man!!! She has been saying that she had one months ago but we knew they she didn't because she was so worried about what we are doing. When we dropped off ss on Sunday we saw him through the window. I am not sure how long this will last( can't see anything wanting to be with such a control freak) but my question is do you think that now that she has a man she will stop all of her BS atleast for a while. I ask this because she has made comments to DH before about that another man is going to take his place as ss father. DH is a good father and we have him everyother weekend and ss loves him so much. But I just know how nasty and bitter she is. Are we getting a break or is this just the beginning of more drama.
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New Drama...Maybe.
If the BM keeps this up, that is, the drama, new BF just might run for the hills on his own. So more or new drama just may be ahead of you when you are dealing with someone like this.
My skids BM still, to this day, has not had a long-term relationship much less married. And they've been divorced for 15 years; we've been together for 11 of those years. I know my hubby is a great guy, but hell, woman go find a man and accept that he's mine, mine, mine!
(At 30 yo SS wedding, which was last year, she told my hubby she still loves him...Yikes, can someone please tell her where the reality door is. The hubby? He puked.)
Anyway, enough about me. Enjoy your new freedom???
thanks for the advice
I think you are right. I know she still wants him and that soon or later this guy will probably realize it also. But listen to your story I guess I will never end. Why is that some women can't just move on.
Hard to say....
When I met my dh he actually difussed a lot of the drama between my son's dad and I. He and my son's dad have a lot in common and they both speak caveman.... when I'm finding it impossible to get on the same page as my son's dad my dh will call him up.... speak stupid to him (aka caveman) and then come back and explain his position to me.
My dh will also tell me if I'm wrong or acting stupid or being a b***h.... he has helped our situation immensely. He also tells me if he thinks I am right.
My dh's ex is engaged now (supposedly).... her fiance' and my dh also get along just fine also....
Guys are wired so differently than us and they seem to be missing the emotional chip that we have in abundance....
I hope her new man will help your situation as well.... but like you said.... who knows how long he will stick around!
"Don't be distracted by criticism. Remember, the only taste of success some people ever have is when they take a bite out of you."
Caveman...
Too funny. Wouldn't it be great if we could all speak that language? My DH and my ex get along very well too. Actually coach baseball together and love going to Hooters after their games (Hooters makes you Happy!). EX has no jealousy and DH knows that my boys already have a dad and does whatever it takes not to interfere. I would LOVE, LOVE, LOVE if BM and I could be on that level. But see my ex is a normal human being and can have normal, civil conversations when we disagree - therefore no interaction is required.
So why is that? Why is it that men can get over it all and get along. And then there are psycho BMs (and SMs) that are in constsnt turmoil????
for a while
I have been in my SS life quite a while and it always seems like when BM has a man she is calm but soon enough the men figure it out and leave her and then she is up causing drama in "our" life again. The drama also occurs when "her man" is about to leave her. I have seen her emotional roller coaster many of times. Enjoy the peace while you can if your BM is anything like the one I have to deal with, the peace will not last long, the guy will figure it out soon enough and leave.
Been there
However, in my case BM was pregnant and had a guy when I met hubby. Didn't matter to her tho. Any guy within a 20 mile radius was free reign to control. And believe me, if they are male, she gets them under her thumb. Can't have them with a brain darnit. But that was just my situation. She did the whole SD is a better dad then you are, treats the kids better, blah blah blah. Hubby just continued to have as best of a relationship as he could with the kids keeping the lines of communication open. It was hard sometimes, but kids are smart, and when you can't keep your own lies, oh, I mean stories straight, they see through it.
BM also tried to get hubby to sign papers so that SD could adopt the kids, change their last name, all that junk. But he refused. Even tried using the CS card as reason for him to sign! Maybe this is your BM taking out her feelings of hurt and jealousy on hubby? Don't know, I can't even begin to understand my kids BM, let alone the actions of another!!
Hang in there, and just try your hardest to have a good relationship with SS and let him know that no matter what you love him.