You are here

Ex had to make a scene

thelaststraw's picture

So she shows up and pays her respects, all well and good right? But apparently not good enough. After she sits with my extended family for just long enough to make them feel uncomfortable, she decides to say "Well, time for me to go" only to stay longer.

She then proceeds to greet several other people, who I am certain wouldn't give a rat's ass if she were there. THEN, while my DW and I are actively talking with one of my cousins, comes over, interrupts that conversation and says goodbye to that cousin with a hug and a hug for my cousin's SO, who SHE HAS NEVER MET BEFORE.

I was nearly apoplectic. I followed her out of the room where the wake was looked at her and said "That was over the top." She simply acted like I was in the wrong.

Now - before comments coming to her defense appear, she has this weird thing like she and I are still emotionally connected. Ugh!

WTF is it with people having to make themselves significant by being in everyone else's face? Seriously, if you don't feel significant based on your own merits, then there's some work you need to get to. If you haven't done that work, leave the rest of us alone because that's what we are doing!

Comments

friendorfoe's picture

First of all, i'm sorry for your loss.

We had the evil ex that won't let DH see their son call crying because he didn't tell her that his grandmother had passed. I'm sorry, but if she doesn't allow the son into his life, why should he tell her about the death. Some women out there just have to make every thing about them and don't see things for how they really are. I'm really sorry you had to go through all that with the ex actually there and acting like it was still her family.

aggravated1's picture

People like her will not see anything wrong with how she behaved. She probably thought it was her place to be there.

I am sorry you had to deal with that; I am sure when the time comes Crackhead will also try to infiltrate family funerals where everyone, including the deceased, hates her guts.

We plan to have a police presence there, if needed.

GizmoBarnOwl's picture

So disapointing. I was really hoping (on your behalf) that she would have been a grown up for this one occasion Sad I guess some people really just dont know how to behave.

I guess at least she didnt cause a massive scene or anything, it just sounds as though she get a bit too comfortable with some of the family....? What an idiot.

How did your wife cope with it? She was worried about her being there in the first place wasnt she?

BSgoinon's picture

I guess it could have been worse, but it surely could have gone better. We all defended her being there, thinking she would take the high road, pay her respects and leave... she just HAD to make a spectical out of herself huh??!!

So true for so many of us...----------->"she has this weird thing like she and I are still emotionally connected. Ugh!"

BM will tell DH things about her family with the "remember when..." and go on to give him an update on what is going on now (8 years later). DH just gives her a blank stare and says "no, I don't remember". I love him. Wink

herewegoagain's picture

Ah, yes, this reminds me of my mom's cousin's funeral. Her aunt and uncle, as well as one of the deceseased's brother were always super nice to the ex. Of course, they told her when the cousin passed away. Sure as shit, she idiot ex decided to sit NEXT TO MIL at the funeral, and thankfully, the ex (my mom's cousin) stood his ground and sat in the BACK with HIS WIFE! It was funny as we were later at the house, how the ex continued to stay inside, be everywhere the ex il's were, etc...to the point that even the ex mil and fil were just sick that she had done this. LOL I didn't even talk to her. Idiot.

Ex's have NO BUSINESS being in ANY FUNERAL. Sorry, I don't care. I don't care how much you loved the person, I can assure you that the brother, etc. loved them more! And even if they had arguments, etc...it is the RIGHT of the FAMILY to be there...You can mourn the person at home...heck, who cares, they are dead and they won't know if you are there or not...but to go and make ANYONE there uncomfortable, is the ultimate act of disrespect.

thelaststraw's picture

Yeah - no way on funerals. Wake? Sure. Pay respects and go. To be frank I can see going to maybe ONE of my EX's family's wakes and that is her brother's if he kicks the bucket before me. He's the only one in the family that I liked. The rest can go to hell and yes, I know what that phrase means in its deepest sense.