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So much for biding my time...

thelaststraw's picture

Submitted by thelaststraw on Tue, 07/26/2016 - 11:52am

Long time - no post...but SASS15 became SASS17 (SASS - stupid azz step son) and has been on a rampage. Stealing alcohol, stealing money/debit cards, smoking weed, coming and going however he pleases. I had already told DW that I was done with him. She is "stunned" that I could give up on a child. Then 2 weeks ago, he thought it would be to pound on his brother for a little bit and then get physical with me.

I relented from beating the snot out of him.

He had already been "talked at" by the cops and after the events of 2 weeks ago was arrested and has since spent time in a detention center. He was released yesterday into our custody.

3 weeks ago, BS and BD say they want to live with me. My Ex agrees to it. I'll just leave this with "I have no idea why she agrees when she has been living off of child support." I neither have nor seek understanding.

Fast forward to the evening where SASS17 got physical with me and BS is PISSED. Fast forward to last night and BS is still PISSED. All of the other kids are trying to feel things out because the grim truth is that he was an absolute DICK in dealing with them as well - like, almost all of the time.

DW, in the last two weeks, while SASS was in custody, remarked many times how peaceful it was with SASS17 being gone. Last night - all she did was defend him. I get the Mama Bear thing, but at some point we gotta realize that some people don't want to be helped and they should just be left alone.

Anyway - we're going to be heading to counseling. I've told her very specifically what I believe but am happy to have a counselor tell me I am wrong.

I guess I'm trying to figure out how DW can expect everything to be copacetic on the very first day that a very toxic person is back in the house. If anyone knows the answer to that riddle I'm happy to hear. Sorry for rambling.

Comments

thelaststraw's picture

Submitted by thelaststraw on Tue, 07/26/2016 - 12:18pm

LadyFace = Voice of Clarity.

While I know I shouldn't have issued an ultimatum, I did anyway when I said "If he's still here after he turns 18, I'm gone."

He had the audacity to come up to me after not seeing me for two weeks and try to give me a hug. I put my hand up and said "We aren't there. Won't be there for a long time." He said he respects that. I don't believe him for a minute.

thelaststraw's picture

Submitted by thelaststraw on Tue, 07/26/2016 - 12:30pm

"IMO it was unfair of you to bring your kids to live in the same house with this troubled older teen"

I'm not going to fight you on that one. The mitigating factor was that my Ex just recently spent 7 days in a behavioral health facility for an undisclosed reason. BS & BD have relayed that she has been erratic. So, let BM do something that could damage them more severely than I can imagine or let SASS17 intimate that he will do something = assault, and he gets shipped off for 6 months? Had to weight that one and I talked it over with BS and BD at length.

I'm saying it here and I'll say it out loud at home. He gets one more strike. And all he has to do is say that he is going to get physical....and I am calling the cops.

So, long story short, I think his situation will be resolved before we even know it.

thelaststraw's picture

Submitted by thelaststraw on Wed, 07/27/2016 - 1:21pm

April 22nd, 2017. It's going to be a long 10 months.

He has already stated that he is moving out once he is 18 and that he needs to get a job and get his act together. I'm going to help him pack though...and that's about as much as I am going to help.