It was actually quite sad. I was surprised to find myself shedding some tears. Sd was devastated and the only way I could describe dh is "broken". I am just going to pretend he is broken because his kid is hurting so bad and not allow myself to think it has anything to do with bm. When I got home I apologized to sd and told her death freaks me out and I over reacted and she said her to. She seems fine with me. Dh was thankful I was there. I sent my boys to a friends house. Bm's siblings and friends came and were nice. Apparently bm was adamant she never wanted a funeral only a bbq life celebration. There were lots of stories told and even though dh told them and I could hear the "love" in his voice I pushed back the jealousy and laughed and asked questions. At one point sd came up and put her arm around my waist and hugged me. I was surprised but I hugged her back and said I love you even though I don't really. She said it back and sorry that she was such a brat. I said that's okay. I was worse at your age. I was really really trying! The rest of the weekend was just laying around with them trying to heal. A little tears but not a lot. I don't know what is going to happen to sd yet. I haven't asked and they haven't told.