Taris's Blog

So glad this yr is ending

I haven't posted in forever but i read every day. I'm so ready to end 2017 like the bad nightmare it was. 2018 will be better because i refuse to live another yr like 2017. Sd is happily living her life, she is back in school in her own place with a boyfriend. She is doing really good and she is nice to me but i struggle to forgive her for dhs tattoo. She has no idea how pissed i am at that!! I can't have sex with dh unless the lights are off or he is wearing a t-shirt. Its disgusting to me and it makes him disgusting to me. How sad is that?

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I'm still angry

Dh is home now and life seems like it's going back to normal (except dh nick named himself pop pop). Sd is moving on and getting on with her life. She seems to be okay although her and dh text like high school lovers. Its disgusting. Anyway, now that life is normal again I'm angry. I'm angry that dh just up an left us running to sd and practically moved in with her. I'm disgusted with his tattoo and the fact thatvsd picked out what is on my husband's chest/side/stomach. I'm pissed that his friends now call him pop pop and that he was showing off his tattoo at a pool party we went to.

Sd had her first Mothers Day with dh

Silly me expecting dh to want to spend the day celebrating me. I was obviously selfish and uncaring to question dh while he was running out the door on Mothers Day weekend. That whole, Where are you going, was un-thoughtful after sd lost her baby and has empty arms on her first Mothers Day. How dare I not understand that she needs him more than ever right now. They took balloons to the park and let them go in honor of the baby then went and had lunch to celebrate sd. I set us up a marriage counseling appointment and if things don't change I will be leaving.

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Dh came home with a tattoo

Dh came home last night from staying with sd. One of her friends came to stay with her for a few days so dh decided to bless us with his presence. How nice right? He got a flipping tattoo over his heart about the size if 3 fists of an angel and the date the baby died with a poem that strolls down to his stomach. It looks f@cking awful!!! I am not a tattoo person and neither was he. It's not attractive at all. He said sd got an angel over her heart and then she picked this out for him. I am so disgusted.

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Bad news

Last Monday sd had a drs visit and they couldn't find the heart beat so they did an ultrasound and found that her baby had passed. Dh called me so upset I couldn't understand what he was saying. He wound up hanging up on me and then sending me a text that said what happened. I feel really awful about this. I hated the fact that my husband spent so much time consumed with sd and her baby but I never would have wished this. I haven't seen dh since then except for a few minutes when he comes to get clothes or movies.

DH is married to sd

I swear this man went from normal to insane the moment he learned he was going to be a grandpa. He goes to sd's dr. appointments with her, they are picking out names, they are researching water births -oh yeah!-, he plans to attend Lamaze classes with her, he found her a pregnant yoga class to take, they go window shopping for baby stuff and plan what to buy once they know what "they" are having. They plan to get double so that some can stay at our house. In the mean time my boys and I are left to float in the wind and ignored. This isn't what I signed up for and I let dh know last night.

Sd moves in today!!

So after much whining and crying from dh, sd signed a lease and today she is moving into her new apartment. We found one that is 20 minutes from the community college she will enroll in and 15 minutes from us. She just has her clothes so we are going to hit up yard sales and thrift stores this weekend and look for furniture. She did buy a bedroom suit from rooms to go and that gets delivered tomorrow. Dh is being a big old baby huffing and puffing saying no one listens to what he wants but he will get over it. Thank you to everyone who offered up advice.

I talked with Sd

I took sd to dinner last night for some girl time and I asked her what she wanted if dad would let her. She said she wanted her own place so after dinner we drove around and looked at some apartments near us. By look I mean we drove through them and looked at the outside. She made a list of some of the nicer ones she liked that were close to us and we are going to go look inside this weekend. I'm also making a list of some near the community college she wants to enroll in. Tonight I am having a big talk with dh.

The princess has arrived

I doubt she is going anywhere. She is eating up all the attention dh is giving her. Dh and i had a huge fight yesterday because my youngest ds was loud getting ready for school and he woke her up. She has morning sickness so she was in the bathroom puking and crying to dh that my ds needs to not wake her up. He took off on my son and I cut in and him and I aren't talking right now. This morning he told my ds t shut his damn mouth. I let him know that isn't acceptable and I swear if looks could kill I would have died right then. I am so pissed off right now.

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Hell NO!!!

Ds overheard dh and sd on the phone last night. He was really angry and I finally got it out of him, he said sd is going to use HIS room as a nursery for her baby!! I confronted dh and he said ds leaves for college the room doesn't need to be empty when the baby needs a room. What about breaks when he comes home? Dh said a blow up mattress in the babys room and the baby can sleep with sd when he is home. I don't think I can live like this. I really don't.

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